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Tag: News

Honkai: Star Rail Players Now Have an Excuse to Procrastinate Even More With Free Crunchyroll Trial, Thanks to Totally Unexpected Collab
Breaking, Games News

Honkai: Star Rail Players Now Have an Excuse to Procrastinate Even More With Free Crunchyroll Trial, Thanks to Totally Unexpected Collab

Pixel P. SnarkbyteOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Well, well, well, look what we have here. Crunchyroll, the streaming service that buffers more than your grandma’s dial-up, is…

“2020 Election Truthers and Their MAGA Minions: Taking Over the Asylum”
Elephant Reads CNN

“2020 Election Truthers and Their MAGA Minions: Taking Over the Asylum”

Big ElephantOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Folks, can you believe the audacity of the liberal media? They’re trying to make heroes out of election riggers and…

Oh, No! Not the Veteran Services! (As if anyone cares)
Elephant Reads CNN

Oh, No! Not the Veteran Services! (As if anyone cares)

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN, still sniffing around for ways to whine now that President Trump is making America great again!…

Max Cavalera on Soulfly’s ‘Chama’ Album: More Punk Than Your Grandma’s Knitting Circle
Breaking, Music News

Max Cavalera on Soulfly’s ‘Chama’ Album: More Punk Than Your Grandma’s Knitting Circle

Chord F. DiscordOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

OMG! SOULFLY is dropping a new album called “Chama” on October 24 via Nuclear Blast Records. Max Cavalera, the mastermind…

ICE Hiring Spree: 10,000 New Reasons to Question Reality
Elephant Reads CNN

ICE Hiring Spree: 10,000 New Reasons to Question Reality

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Another day, another leftist media outlet trying to undermine our GREAT President Trump! CNN is now hyperventilating because ICE is…

Mortgage Rates Plunge to Rock Bottom of the Already Pathetic 2025
Elephant Reads CNN

Mortgage Rates Plunge to Rock Bottom of the Already Pathetic 2025

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump! Even the failing CNN has to admit that mortgage rates are dropping. You…

Kirby Air Ride 2: Electric Boogaloo Finally Confirmed (But Probably Still Sucks)
Breaking, Games News

Kirby Air Ride 2: Electric Boogaloo Finally Confirmed (But Probably Still Sucks)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! 🙄 The sequel to the GameCube “classic” (and I use that term loosely, like…

Pokémon TCG Pocket Screams About “Mega Rising” Expansion and Pretends to Change Trading (Again)
Breaking, Games News

Pokémon TCG Pocket Screams About “Mega Rising” Expansion and Pretends to Change Trading (Again)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

OMG!😱 Mega Evolution is making a comeback in 2025, because apparently, the Pokémon Company thinks we haven’t suffered enough. Pokémon…

Trump Whines He Can’t Afford New Gold-Plated Toilet, Sues Biden for $230M
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Whines He Can’t Afford New Gold-Plated Toilet, Sues Biden for $230M

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Here we go again with the Fake News CNN trying to smear our glorious President Trump! They’re clutching their pearls…

Glacier-chasing yachts for clueless tourists, pink ribbons for profit, and pointless step counting: Read our groundbreaking news
Elephant Reads CNN

Glacier-chasing yachts for clueless tourists, pink ribbons for profit, and pointless step counting: Read our groundbreaking news

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

👋 Welcome to 5 Things PM! More like 5 Ways the Liberal Media is Trying to Brainwash You! They want…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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