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Tag: News

ADAM GONTIER on THREE DAYS GRACE’s Tag-Team Vocals: “The Fans Deserved This Circus”
Breaking, Music News

ADAM GONTIER on THREE DAYS GRACE’s Tag-Team Vocals: “The Fans Deserved This Circus”

Chord F. DiscordDecember 7, 2025December 7, 2025

In a groundbreaking interview with Estonia’s AlteRock, the dynamic duo of THREE DAYS GRACE – Adam Gontier and Matt Walst…

CNN Discovers Trump’s SHOCKING Kennedy Center Makeover: You Won’t BELIEVE What He Did
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Discovers Trump’s SHOCKING Kennedy Center Makeover: You Won’t BELIEVE What He Did

Big ElephantDecember 7, 2025December 7, 2025

Well, folks, looks like CNN is at it again, whining about President Trump making the Kennedy Center GREAT AGAIN! Apparently,…

From Gold Medal to Jail Cell: This Snowboarder’s Wild Ride to the FBI’s Most Wanted List
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

From Gold Medal to Jail Cell: This Snowboarder’s Wild Ride to the FBI’s Most Wanted List

Big ElephantDecember 6, 2025December 6, 2025

Another snowflake melts into a puddle of liberal tears! Former Olympian Ryan Wedding, who probably voted for Biden, is now…

Netflix Gambles $72 Billion on Entertainment’s Next Big Flop
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Netflix Gambles $72 Billion on Entertainment’s Next Big Flop

Big ElephantDecember 5, 2025December 5, 2025

Netflix, that bastion of leftist Hollywood values, is buying Warner Bros. and HBO for a measly $72 billion. Can you…

Avengers: Endgame Returns to Theaters to Distract You From Impending Doom
Breaking, Movie News

Avengers: Endgame Returns to Theaters to Distract You From Impending Doom

FinnDecember 5, 2025December 5, 2025

OMG! 😱 Did you hear the earth-shattering news? Avengers: Endgame, the movie that made you cry harder than when your…

Roland Gift Spotted at Train Station, Probably Just Lost
Breaking

Roland Gift Spotted at Train Station, Probably Just Lost

Chord F. DiscordDecember 5, 2025December 5, 2025

Roland Gift, of *checks notes* Fine Young Cannibals (who?), decided to grace the peasants at London’s St. Pancras International with…

Consumer Spending Taking a Snooze While Inflation’s Still Throwing a Party
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Consumer Spending Taking a Snooze While Inflation’s Still Throwing a Party

Big ElephantDecember 5, 2025December 5, 2025

Fake News CNN is at it again, folks! They’re trying to make you believe the economy is struggling, but don’t…

Helldivers 2: Witness the Clankers Get Clapped (and Everything’s Still Burning)
Breaking, Games News

Helldivers 2: Witness the Clankers Get Clapped (and Everything’s Still Burning)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 4, 2025December 4, 2025

Alright, listen up, ya filthy casuals! Helldivers 2, the only game that matters (according to me, and I’m always right),…

Nickelodeon’s Sliming Its Way Into Fortnite, Bringing Back That One Guy You Forgot Existed
Breaking, Games News

Nickelodeon’s Sliming Its Way Into Fortnite, Bringing Back That One Guy You Forgot Existed

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 4, 2025December 4, 2025

Oh, great, ANOTHER collab! 🙄 Fortnite, in its infinite wisdom (or lack thereof), is apparently dragging Nickelodeon’s *Danny Phantom* into…

Swallow the Sun Bio: Now in English (ish) – Preorder Before We Change Our Minds
Breaking, Music News

Swallow the Sun Bio: Now in English (ish) – Preorder Before We Change Our Minds

Chord F. DiscordDecember 4, 2025December 4, 2025

OMG! 😱 Prepare yourselves, metalheads, for the most groundbreaking, earth-shattering news of the century! Century Media Records is proud to…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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