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Tag: News

Fortnite’s Next Season is Definitely Not Going to be a Total Disaster and Will Probably Change Your Life Forever When It’s Announced by the Infamous Gaming Guru Ben Starr at SGF 2026
Breaking, Games News

Fortnite’s Next Season is Definitely Not Going to be a Total Disaster and Will Probably Change Your Life Forever When It’s Announced by the Infamous Gaming Guru Ben Starr at SGF 2026

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 3, 2026June 3, 2026

Get ready for the most epic announcement in the history of announcements: Ben Starr, the voice of The Visitor in…

Liberal LA Mayor Bass wins, because Californians love failed leaders
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal LA Mayor Bass wins, because Californians love failed leaders

Big ElephantJune 3, 2026June 3, 2026

Oh joy, folks, it’s another day in the swamp that is Washington D.C., and our glorious President Donald Trump is…

Liberal elites worship self-controlling computers, how quaint and unAmerican
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal elites worship self-controlling computers, how quaint and unAmerican

Big ElephantJune 3, 2026June 3, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, the fake news media is at it again, trying to spin their web of lies and…

Lebanon’s problems gonna ruin Trump’s masterplan to crush Iran somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Lebanon’s problems gonna ruin Trump’s masterplan to crush Iran somehow

Big ElephantJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

Oh boy, are the fake news media and the liberal elites going to have a field day with this one.…

ACCEPT Drops Earth Shattering Masterpiece ‘Fast As A Shark’ Featuring Random Music Legends They Found In Their Attic PHILIP ANSELMO, KIRK HAMMETT, BILLY SHEEHAN, MIKKEY DEE
Breaking, Music News

ACCEPT Drops Earth Shattering Masterpiece ‘Fast As A Shark’ Featuring Random Music Legends They Found In Their Attic PHILIP ANSELMO, KIRK HAMMETT, BILLY SHEEHAN, MIKKEY DEE

Chord F. DiscordJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤩🎸 German/American heavy metal legends ACCEPT are celebrating 50 years…

ICE detainees whine about free lodging at Delaney Hall apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

ICE detainees whine about free lodging at Delaney Hall apparently

Big ElephantJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

Oh, great, another bunch of fake news coming from the liberal mainstream media, trying to undermine the great work of…

Maverick Games Steals All the Forza Devs and Now They’re Making a Game That’s Totally Not Just Forza But With a Different Name and Probably the Same Bugs
Breaking, Games News

Maverick Games Steals All the Forza Devs and Now They’re Making a Game That’s Totally Not Just Forza But With a Different Name and Probably the Same Bugs

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

Get ready to put the pedal to the metal, folks! 🚗💨 Maverick Games has just announced its debut title, Clutch,…

Game of Thrones: Because You Clearly Didn’t Get Enough of People Screaming at Each Other in the Original Series, Now There’s a Mobile Game Called Dragonfire
Breaking, Games News

Game of Thrones: Because You Clearly Didn’t Get Enough of People Screaming at Each Other in the Original Series, Now There’s a Mobile Game Called Dragonfire

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic dragon riding and throne claiming? 🐉👑 With only a few weeks…

SONNY SANDOVAL On P.O.D.’s Upcoming LP: ‘It’s Definitely Not Going to Be a Trainwreck and Will Totally Not Be Forgotten in a Month’
Breaking News: P.O.D. Finishes Recording New Album and It's Going to Be a Wild Ride 🎉🔥
Breaking, Music News

SONNY SANDOVAL On P.O.D.’s Upcoming LP: ‘It’s Definitely Not Going to Be a Trainwreck and Will Totally Not Be Forgotten in a Month’

Chord F. DiscordJune 1, 2026June 1, 2026

The wait is over, folks! P.O.D. has finally completed work on their brand new studio album, and we can’t wait…

Zack Snyder to Ruin Another Classic with His Signature Brand of Soulless Explosions in the Totally Necessary Remake of Escape From New York
Breaking, Movie News

Zack Snyder to Ruin Another Classic with His Signature Brand of Soulless Explosions in the Totally Necessary Remake of Escape From New York

FinnJune 1, 2026June 1, 2026

Breaking news, folks: Snake Plissken is back from the dead, and we’re not sure if we should be excited or…

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Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Washington D.C. Sees Sudden Drop to No Crime Under President Trump
  • NEW TRANSMISSION Micron pours first concrete at New York fab in US investment push
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: Micron invests $250 billion creating 100000 American jobs
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Micron to invest 250 billion dollars in US memory chip production
  • Vance Expands Housing Portfolio With Spare Virginia Mansion

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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