Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: News

Prime Video Says “Boi” To Accuracy, Casts Completely Unrelated Beefcake As Kratos For God of War
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

Prime Video Says “Boi” To Accuracy, Casts Completely Unrelated Beefcake As Kratos For God of War

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

Hold onto your Leviathan Axe and prepare your most dramatic sighs, gamers, because Sony and Amazon have finally decided to…

Possible Leaker To Washington Post Admits He ‘Mishandled Classified Information,’ DOJ Says
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Possible Leaker To Washington Post Admits He ‘Mishandled Classified Information,’ DOJ Says

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

Finally! A REAL President who isn’t afraid to crack down on the deep state and the Fake News media that…

Iran Streets Boringly Calm After Those Fun Protests, Everyone Go Home
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Iran Streets Boringly Calm After Those Fun Protests, Everyone Go Home

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

While the Fake News Media at CNN tries to paint a picture of “normalcy” in Iran, true patriots know the…

Dolls, Pencils, a Chicken, and a Broccoli Floret: The Trump Team’s Hilarious Scolding on How You Should Probably Just Eat Less
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Dolls, Pencils, a Chicken, and a Broccoli Floret: The Trump Team’s Hilarious Scolding on How You Should Probably Just Eat Less

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

LIBERAL MEDIA LOSES ITS MIND OVER AMERICAN FAMILIES SAVING MONEY (Sponsored by Big Doll) CNN and their so-called “journalists” are…

WITHIN TEMPTATION and SMASH INTO PIECES Somehow Manage to Not Explode During ‘Somebody Like You’ Video
Breaking, Music News

WITHIN TEMPTATION and SMASH INTO PIECES Somehow Manage to Not Explode During ‘Somebody Like You’ Video

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

Step right up, music lovers, and witness the symphonic miracle! 🎭 Your favorite symphonic metal overlords, WITHIN TEMPTATION, have decided…

Analysis: Is Trump Serious About Buying Greenland? Let’s Map Out This 4D Chess Masterstroke
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Analysis: Is Trump Serious About Buying Greenland? Let’s Map Out This 4D Chess Masterstroke

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

President Donald J. Trump is playing 4D chess while the weak-kneed globalists in Copenhagen are busy melting down. He’s dead…

What Happened to Minneapolis Businesses When ICE Came to Town And Absolutely Nobody Asked for a Receipt
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

What Happened to Minneapolis Businesses When ICE Came to Town And Absolutely Nobody Asked for a Receipt

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

EL BURRITO MERCADO: Democrats in Minnesota Panic as President Trump’s Patriot ICE Raids Expose the Woke Economy! President Trump’s second…

75% of Americans Say Leave Greenland Alone Because Nobody Wants to Visit a Frozen Florida
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

75% of Americans Say Leave Greenland Alone Because Nobody Wants to Visit a Frozen Florida

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

CNN’s Newest Fake News Poll: Weak-Kneed Liberals Cower as President Trump Makes America GIANT Again! In a hilarious new “poll”…

Sophie Turner Spotted Searching For Lost Sequel While Dressed As Lara Croft As Prime Video Desperately Hopes You Forgot About Those Last Movies
Breaking, Movie News

Sophie Turner Spotted Searching For Lost Sequel While Dressed As Lara Croft As Prime Video Desperately Hopes You Forgot About Those Last Movies

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

🚨BREAKING NEWS, GAMERS & NON-BELIEVERS! 🚨 The internet has officially melted down because Prime Video just dropped the first image…

Pentagon Spends $125 Million to Prove They’re Still in the Business of Killing People
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Pentagon Spends $125 Million to Prove They’re Still in the Business of Killing People

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

CNN is crying crocodile tears over President Trump’s brilliant rebranding of the Pentagon to the Department of War, claiming it…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 83 84 85 … 213 Next

Latest posts

  • ARCHITECTS Singer SAM CARTER Reveals The Most Metal Thing That’s Ever Happened To Him: METALLICA’s JAMES HETFIELD Brought Them A Cake And Didn’t Even Smash It
  • SBC Approves Use Of Tasers On Any Visitor Who Tries To Slip Past Greeters
  • When your parents ask what kind of music you listen to
  • Enhanced Games Allows Competing Athletes To Use Steroids
  • Woman Worried She In Codependent Relationship With Rest Of Humanity 

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
May 2026
S M T W T F S
 12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930
31  
« Apr    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}