Pokémon Throws a 30th Birthday Bash, Crashes Super Bowl Like a Mewtwo at a Magikarp Convention
Oh, look! Pikachu’s finally ready for his Super Bowl debut—better late than never, right? Pokémon is turning 30, and instead…
Tag: NFL
Deportation Bingo Champion Benched, Rich Folks’ Bonus Season Arrives, and Surviving Winter Like a Simpsons Character: Sip Your Daily Dose of Despair Scroll-Delight LOLsob
Welcome to 5 Things PM – the only newsletter not infected with Woke Mind Virus™! While the fake news media…
Lily Zhang Shatters Patriarchy, Tops MLTT Rankings in Historic Plot Twist
Leftist Hollywood’s Latest Masterpiece: Timothée Chalamet’s Table Tennis Propaganda Film Promotes ‘Woke’ Ping Pong Over Traditional American Sports In a…
Ravens vs Steelers AFC North Championship HipHop Watch Party Trolling NOLA SEAFOOD
Eventbrite just canceled the Ravens vs. Steelers watch party—because apparently, football fans can’t handle both cheese fries and hope 🤷♂️…
Los Angeles Kings Release Eight-Minute Propaganda Film Featuring BRUCE DICKINSON Butcherizing U.S. National Anthem
So, get this! IRON MAIDEN’s very own air-raid siren, Bruce Dickinson, decided to grace the Los Angeles Kings with his…
Jimmy Kimmel’s Comedy Career Enters WWE-Style Cage Match with Broadcast TV’s Decrepit Corpse
Oh, the drama! The liberal elites thought they could silence our beloved President Trump by going after Jimmy Kimmel? Think…
From Touchdown to the Doghouse: Ex-NFL Star Gets Benched for Brutal Dogfighting Ring, Canine Castaways Flood Shelters
Another day, another woke agenda item! Seems like the Deep State is at it again, folks. This time, they’re going…
Witness the Glorious Trainwreck: Mariachi Band Violates Ozzy’s ‘Crazy Train’
Video of the Mariachi Rams, bless their cotton socks 🧦, playing a *slightly* butchered adaptation of the timeless 🕰️ Ozzy…
Inside 345 Park Avenue: A Totally Normal Day Until, You Know, *That* Happened
Folks, can you believe what happened in New York City? Another day, another mass shooting, and where does it happen?…
Witness the Utter Carnage: The Offspring Butcher Ozzy’s ‘Crazy Train’ in Appalling Tribute
California pop-punk has-beens THE OFFSPRING, desperate for attention as always, decided the best way to stay relevant was to butcher…