Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Other

Star Rail’s latest update hijacks your wallet August 26 with version 4.6
Breaking, Games News

Star Rail’s latest update hijacks your wallet August 26 with version 4.6

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 14, 2026August 14, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, HoYoverse has actually managed to release a update for Honkai: Star Rail without slapping…

Gotta Catch Em All Overpriced Doughnuts Now
Breaking, Games News

Gotta Catch Em All Overpriced Doughnuts Now

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 14, 2026August 14, 2026

Pokémon and Krispy Kreme are at it again, because what’s a better way to celebrate a 30th anniversary than by…

Modern Warfare 4 beta throws in everything including kitchen sink apparently
Breaking, Games News

Modern Warfare 4 beta throws in everything including kitchen sink apparently

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 14, 2026August 14, 2026

Get ready for the most predictable, yet somehow still exciting, news in the gaming world: Activision has announced the beta…

Mastodon drops new video because you clearly didnt have enough prog metal in your life yet
Breaking, Music News

Mastodon drops new video because you clearly didnt have enough prog metal in your life yet

Chord F. DiscordAugust 14, 2026August 14, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤯 MASTODON just dropped the official music video for “In…

DOM LAWSON has a heart attack because metal isn’t loud enough apparently his heart needed more motivation
Breaking, Music News

DOM LAWSON has a heart attack because metal isn’t loud enough apparently his heart needed more motivation

Chord F. DiscordAugust 14, 2026August 14, 2026

Oh no, the metal world is shaken to its core: Dom Lawson, the renowned UK metal journalist, has suffered a…

Paxton Calmly Tells Republicans To Stop Freaking Out Already
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Paxton Calmly Tells Republicans To Stop Freaking Out Already

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading about Ken Paxton’s latest campaign moves. It seems like he’s trying to unify…

Feds Spying on Minnesota Progressives Because Who Needs Privacy Anyway
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Feds Spying on Minnesota Progressives Because Who Needs Privacy Anyway

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Federal agents launched a sweeping undercover surveillance operation targeting progressive organizations,…

Trump Gives Corporations License To Hack Around
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Gives Corporations License To Hack Around

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Trump administration is now enlisting private companies to conduct cyberattacks…

Selena Gomez’s Mental Health Startup Apparently Needs Therapy Itself
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Selena Gomez’s Mental Health Startup Apparently Needs Therapy Itself

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Selena Gomez’s mental health startup, Wondermind, and I have to say, it’s a…

Nick Holmes Still Clinging To Gothic Metal Label Because It Sounds Cooler Than Middle Aged Man Playing Music
Breaking, Music News

Nick Holmes Still Clinging To Gothic Metal Label Because It Sounds Cooler Than Middle Aged Man Playing Music

Chord F. DiscordAugust 14, 2026August 14, 2026

Oh no, the pioneers of gothic metal are still alive and kicking, and I’m not sure if I should be…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 19 20 21 … 28 Next

Latest posts

  • Puerto Rico runs dry because who needs water anyway
  • Turnstile Drops Star Studded NEVER ENOUGH VERSIONS EP
  • Mormon Temple Gets Extreme Makeover Apparently
  • Kids These Days Gambled $5 Billion on Kalshi
  • Judge saves democracy from itself, temporarily

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.