Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Pantera

Mike Portnoy Credits Lars Ulrich as a “Big Influence,” World Laughs, Drummers Faint
Breaking, Music News

Mike Portnoy Credits Lars Ulrich as a “Big Influence,” World Laughs, Drummers Faint

Chord F. DiscordJune 24, 2025June 24, 2025

In a groundbreaking interview with the intellectual powerhouse known as El Estepario Siberiano, DREAM THEATER’s resident drum-twirling wizard, Mike Portnoy,…

Metallica’s ‘Hometown’ Concerts: A Behind-the-Scenes Look at Their 2025 ‘M72’ Tour (Spoiler: They’re Still in San Francisco)
Breaking, Music News

Metallica’s ‘Hometown’ Concerts: A Behind-the-Scenes Look at Their 2025 ‘M72’ Tour (Spoiler: They’re Still in San Francisco)

Chord F. DiscordJune 23, 2025June 23, 2025

So, METALLICA’s tour coordinator, this dude Jon-Michael Marino (who?), gave KPIX (aka CBS Bay Area, which, let’s be honest, nobody…

Ex-BUTCHER BABIES Singer’s New Single: ‘Hell Or Hollywood’ – More Like ‘Heck No, Hollywood’
Breaking

Ex-BUTCHER BABIES Singer’s New Single: ‘Hell Or Hollywood’ – More Like ‘Heck No, Hollywood’

Chord F. DiscordJune 13, 2025June 13, 2025

πŸŽ€πŸŽΈπŸ’€Oh, sweet baby Jesus! BUTCHER BABIES’ founding screamer, the one and only Carla Harvey (who apparently moonlighted as a mortician…

Ice Nine Kills’ Spencer Charnas: We Succeeded When We Stopped Caring What You Plebs Thought
Breaking, Music News

Ice Nine Kills’ Spencer Charnas: We Succeeded When We Stopped Caring What You Plebs Thought

Chord F. DiscordJune 9, 2025June 9, 2025

ICE NINE KILLS (more like ICE NINE CHILLS, amirite? πŸ˜‚) frontman Spencer Charnas (who?) is gracing us with his presence…

Sharon Osbourne’s Dream Team: Judas Priest & Angus Young (Ozzy’s Farewell…Or Is It?)
Breaking

Sharon Osbourne’s Dream Team: Judas Priest & Angus Young (Ozzy’s Farewell…Or Is It?)

Chord F. DiscordJune 8, 2025June 8, 2025

OMG 😱! Sharon Osbourne, the puppet master πŸ€Ήβ€β™€οΈ behind the geriatric rocker Ozzy, is at it again! Apparently, Ozzy’s so…

Videos

Pantera in Charlotte, NC (05/31/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyJune 1, 2025

American heavy metal from Arlington, Texas!

Videos

Pantera in Charlotte, NC (05/31/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyJune 1, 2025

American heavy metal from Arlington, Texas!

Pantera in Charlotte, NC (05/31/2025)
Videos

Pantera in Charlotte, NC (05/31/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyJune 1, 2025

American heavy metal from Arlington, Texas!

Behold: Ex-BUTCHER BABIES Vocalist CARLA HARVEY Humiliates Herself Onstage With LORDS OF ACID For the Very First Time
Breaking

Behold: Ex-BUTCHER BABIES Vocalist CARLA HARVEY Humiliates Herself Onstage With LORDS OF ACID For the Very First Time

Chord F. DiscordJune 1, 2025June 1, 2025

OMG! 😱 The internet is ablaze πŸ”₯ with news that former BUTCHER BABIES banshee Carla Harvey (who? πŸ€”) has graced…

Ozzy promises to give 120% at his final concert, which is only 20% more than medically possible
Breaking

Ozzy promises to give 120% at his final concert, which is only 20% more than medically possible

Chord F. DiscordMay 29, 2025May 29, 2025

So, apparently, Ozzy Osbourne, that bat-biting legend (or should we say, legend in his own mind? πŸ€”), is planning a…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 5 6 7 Next

Latest posts

  • Sometime in February in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2026)
  • Hinayana in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2026)
  • Fires in the Distance in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2026)
  • MΓΆtley CrΓΌe in Houston, TX (09/11/2026)
  • Tesla in Houston, TX (09/11/2026)

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright Β© 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.