Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: president

Judge Doodles Over Hilarious Attempt to Stop West Virginia National Guard from Visiting DC’s Exciting Tourist Traps
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Judge Doodles Over Hilarious Attempt to Stop West Virginia National Guard from Visiting DC’s Exciting Tourist Traps

Big ElephantNovember 10, 2025November 10, 2025

Another day, another frivolous lawsuit from the radical Left! West Virginia’s National Guard is bravely assisting President Trump in securing…

5 Things You Absolutely Need to Panic About Today (or Don’t, Whatever)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things You Absolutely Need to Panic About Today (or Don’t, Whatever)

Big ElephantNovember 10, 2025November 10, 2025

Fake News CNN is still at it, folks! They’re pushing their usual doom and gloom while our GREAT President Trump…

Shutdownageddon: Schools Implode Because Congress Can’t Play Nice
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Shutdownageddon: Schools Implode Because Congress Can’t Play Nice

Big ElephantNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

More socialist handouts! Now they want to indoctrinate our kids with taxpayer money! Lackland, Texas, is just the tip of…

BBC’s Brain Drain: Blame Trump, Blame the Moon, Blame Your Annoying Coworker, Just Blame Something
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

BBC’s Brain Drain: Blame Trump, Blame the Moon, Blame Your Annoying Coworker, Just Blame Something

Big ElephantNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

Oh, the BBC’s boss is stepping down? Probably because he couldn’t handle the TRUTH! The swamp runs deep, even across…

Aaron Lewis Sings ‘Am I The Only One’ to Charlie Kirk: God’s Favorite Patriot Gets a Tune
Breaking, Music News

Aaron Lewis Sings ‘Am I The Only One’ to Charlie Kirk: God’s Favorite Patriot Gets a Tune

Chord F. DiscordNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

Ah, yes, another groundbreaking moment in modern music history. 🙄 STAIND’s very own deep thinker, Aaron Lewis, took a break…

U.S. Senators’ Brainwave Sync: Government Might Reopen (Maybe)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

U.S. Senators’ Brainwave Sync: Government Might Reopen (Maybe)

Big ElephantNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

Desperate Dems Cave as Trump’s America Keeps Winning! Another pathetic attempt by the radical left to obstruct our glorious President…

BBC Bigwigs Bail After Botching Trump Tirade Tweak: CNN Reports
BBC Heads Roll After Trump Speech Gets the 'Woke' Edit!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

BBC Bigwigs Bail After Botching Trump Tirade Tweak: CNN Reports

Big ElephantNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

The chickens are coming home to roost at the BBC! Two top commies resigned after being caught red-handed trying to…

MUDVAYNE’s New Album: Chad Gray’s Got NO CLUE, LOL
Breaking, Music News

MUDVAYNE’s New Album: Chad Gray’s Got NO CLUE, LOL

Chord F. DiscordNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

In a recent interview with Toilet Ov Hell (yes, you read that right 🚽), MUDVAYNE’s supreme leader, Chad Gray, graced…

Prepare to say ‘I do’ to crippling debt: How tariffs are about to obliterate your wedding budget
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Prepare to say ‘I do’ to crippling debt: How tariffs are about to obliterate your wedding budget

Big ElephantNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

Oh, the horror! It seems even weddings aren’t safe from the clutches of globalist tariffs, according to CNN, which is…

Newsom Declares Dems’ Tuesday Triumphs, Like Prop 50, Usher in ‘a new moment’ (as if we didn’t see it coming) for the Party | CNN Politics
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Newsom Declares Dems’ Tuesday Triumphs, Like Prop 50, Usher in ‘a new moment’ (as if we didn’t see it coming) for the Party | CNN Politics

Big ElephantNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

Gavin Newsom, fresh from his “sweeping election victory” (thanks to rigging the system, no doubt!), is now claiming it represents…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 145 146 147 … 269 Next

Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: VANDALS target World War II Monument and Reflecting Pool areas
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Kennedy Center needs major fix to regain greatness and prestige
  • !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ORANGE!ORACLE!UPDATE: Ted Cruz pens book about Clarence Thomas’s rise and achievements
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Hochul Releases 7000 Hard Core Criminals Onto New York Streets
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: DJT says US lost 60 billion dollars annually to Canada for years

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.