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Tag: president

US Military Loses Two In Sudden Case Of War
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Military Loses Two In Sudden Case Of War

Big ElephantJuly 20, 2026

I’m sitting here sipping my coffee, reading about the latest developments in the Middle East, and I just can’t help…

Booze Industry Goes Small To Get Really Big
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Booze Industry Goes Small To Get Really Big

Big ElephantJuly 20, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one: it seems the future of booze is getting smaller, and I’m…

Trump Team Begs for More Defense Cash Again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Team Begs for More Defense Cash Again

Big ElephantJuly 20, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Pentagon is in a bit of a pickle, and they’re…

Trump’s Iran Plan Apparently Involves Making Things Worse Quickly
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Iran Plan Apparently Involves Making Things Worse Quickly

Big ElephantJuly 20, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like the situation with Iran is getting more complicated…

Vice President Delighted by Usha Vance’s New Baby PR Opportunity
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Vice President Delighted by Usha Vance’s New Baby PR Opportunity

Big ElephantJuly 19, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one – Vice President JD Vance just announced that his wife, Usha…

Trump Still Somehow Relevant Four Years Later Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Still Somehow Relevant Four Years Later Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 19, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading this article about the 2026 election, and I have to say, it’s a…

Jonathan Cain Calls Out Bruce Springsteen As Cranky Old Guy Who Wont Stop Yapping About Politics
Breaking, Music News

Jonathan Cain Calls Out Bruce Springsteen As Cranky Old Guy Who Wont Stop Yapping About Politics

Chord F. DiscordJuly 19, 2026July 19, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some piping hot takes from Jonathan Cain, the keyboardist of Journey? 🙄 Because…

Butterfat Prices Plummet Mercifully
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Butterfat Prices Plummet Mercifully

Big ElephantJuly 19, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about ice cream prices, because, priorities. Apparently, ice cream prices are cooling off ahead…

Maine Democrats Nominate Guy Not Named Susan Collins
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Maine Democrats Nominate Guy Not Named Susan Collins

Big ElephantJuly 18, 2026

So, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest developments in the Maine Senate race, and I’ve got to…

Netanyahu Might Get Arrested in New York Because Why Not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Netanyahu Might Get Arrested in New York Because Why Not

Big ElephantJuly 18, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani is still considering arresting Israeli…

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