The Kingdom Hearts franchise is getting an anime series, because what’s a beloved gaming property without a TV show, right? The announcement was made at this year’s D23 Expo, Disney’s big fan convention in Anaheim, California, where executives reportedly nodded very seriously during an expensive meeting. The show is being developed in partnership with video game creator Tetsuya Nomura and the creative team at SQUARE ENIX, and will “reimagine the iconic adventure with a brand-new story that will expand on the universe of Kingdom Hearts while celebrating the characters that have captured the hearts of millions of fans around the world.” Because, you know, the 15 games in the series just weren’t enough.
The press release promises that the show will be “unmistakably ‘Kingdom Hearts,'” which is a relief, because who wouldn’t want to watch a TV show that’s just like a video game, but without the interactive part? Disney Kids & Family President Ayo Davis said, “Kingdom Hearts has captivated gamers everywhere with its unique blend of adventure and imagination. There’s something really exciting about taking a world fans have spent years exploring through the games and bringing it to life in a completely new way.” You know, like every other video game adaptation ever made.
The Never-Ending Cycle of Adaptations
It’s not like we haven’t seen this before. A popular game gets a TV show, and then the TV show gets a movie, and then the movie gets a sequel, and then the sequel gets a reboot. It’s like Hollywood is trying to create some kind of perpetual motion machine, where ideas are constantly being recycled and rehashed, but never actually moving forward. And we’re not even getting started on the merchandising opportunities, which have reportedly expanded faster than the screenplay.
As part of the same presentation, Disney also revealed that Coco will be featured in the upcoming Kingdom Hearts IV game, which is expected to go on sale in late 2027. Because what’s a Kingdom Hearts game without a little bit of Pixar magic? It’s like the Franchise Resurrection Department is working overtime to bring back every beloved character and intellectual property from the past few decades. Somewhere, an executive whispered, “Can this become a trilogy?”
The Future of Entertainment: More of the Same
The Kingdom Hearts anime series is just the latest example of Hollywood’s annual Nostalgia Harvest, where old ideas are dug up, dusted off, and repackaged for a new generation. It’s like the Content Mines remain fully operational, churning out remake after reboot after sequel. And we’re not even complaining about it, because at this point, what’s the difference? It’s all just more content to fill the void, more noise to distract us from the fact that actual original ideas are few and far between.
The show’s success will depend on whether it can capture the magic of the games, but let’s be real, it’s not like it’s going to be a flop or anything. The Kingdom Hearts franchise has a dedicated fan base, and they’ll eat up anything with the series’ name on it. And even if it’s not great, who cares? It’s not like it’s going to hurt anyone. It’s just more noise, more content, more of the same old same old. Somewhere, an algorithm has decided that audiences wanted this, and that’s all that matters.
In the end, it’s just another day in the world of Hollywood, where the Merchandising Department reportedly approved the decision before the writers did, and where investors reportedly became emotional after hearing the phrase “shared cinematic universe.” Because that’s what it’s all about: making money, not making art. And if that means churning out the same old ideas over and over again, then so be it. After all, as the great philosopher once said, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” Unless, of course, you can remake it, reboot it, or sequel it. Then, by all means, go for it.
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
