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Tag: president

Pentagon’s AI Going Full Skynet in Iran Strikes While Tech Bros Throw Shade Over Military Contracts
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Pentagon’s AI Going Full Skynet in Iran Strikes While Tech Bros Throw Shade Over Military Contracts

Big ElephantMarch 7, 2026March 7, 2026

Breaking: Trump Unleashes AI-Guided Nukes on Iran — Because Why Not? In a stunning display of American military might, President…

MAGA Georgia Elections Board: Trump’s Blueprint to Steal Atlanta’s 2020 Ballots Exposed!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

MAGA Georgia Elections Board: Trump’s Blueprint to Steal Atlanta’s 2020 Ballots Exposed!

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

The MAGA takeover of Georgia’s elections is now complete, as the FBI swoops in to seize 656 boxes of ballots…

They Survived Iraq, Now They’re the Democrats’ Secret Weapon Against Iran’s War — Or at Least Their Loudest Complainers
BREAKING: DEMOCRATS IN DISARRAY AS TRUMP BOMBS IRAN INTO SUBMISSION
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

They Survived Iraq, Now They’re the Democrats’ Secret Weapon Against Iran’s War — Or at Least Their Loudest Complainers

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

The Deep State is losing its collective mind as President Trump continues his mission to Make America Great Again. These…

Texas Showdown: Dems and GOP Learn the One Big Takeaway… Spoiler: It’s Still Hot as Hell
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Showdown: Dems and GOP Learn the One Big Takeaway… Spoiler: It’s Still Hot as Hell

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

The Texas primaries are in the books, and it’s clear that Democrats are struggling to find their footing in the…

Transgender Kansans, ID-less and Terrified, Brace for a Future of Legal Chaos and Public Exile | CNN
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Transgender Kansans, ID-less and Terrified, Brace for a Future of Legal Chaos and Public Exile | CNN

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

Breaking: Kansas Forces Transgender Citizens to Surrender IDs in Shocking New Law In a move that would make Stalin blush,…

After tariffs, inflation, and gas prices, small businesses now dealing with existential dread and the crushing weight of capitalism’s endless appetite for their soul
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

After tariffs, inflation, and gas prices, small businesses now dealing with existential dread and the crushing weight of capitalism’s endless appetite for their soul

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

Gas Prices Skyrocket as Trump’s America Gets Punched in the Gut Look, I’m not saying Democrats and their Iranian puppet…

Savannah Guthrie ‘plans to return’ to the ‘Today’ show, NBC says
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Savannah Guthrie ‘plans to return’ to the ‘Today’ show, NBC says

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026

Oh, Look! Savannah Guthrie “Plans to Return” to Today Show—Because Apparently, Searching for Her Missing Mom Was Just a Coffee…

3 Women Found Dead in Utah Sparks Manhunt, Chaos, and Everyone Freaking Out Like It’s the End of Days
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

3 Women Found Dead in Utah Sparks Manhunt, Chaos, and Everyone Freaking Out Like It’s the End of Days

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

Yet Another “Hiker Found Dead” Story, But Wait, There’s More! Well, well, well, look who decided to go hiking in…

What to Expect in Friday’s Jobs Report: A Comedy of Economic Errors | CNN Business
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

What to Expect in Friday’s Jobs Report: A Comedy of Economic Errors | CNN Business

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

Another Trump Economic “Win” – Small Businesses Struggle as Trade Wars Backfire Small businesses across America are reportedly struggling to…

MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE, TOOL, LIMP BIZKIT And PIERCE THE VEIL To Headline 2026 AFTERSHOCK Festival Because Your Inner 2004 Just Called And Wants Its Playlist Back
Hold My Beer (and My Sanity): Aftershock 2026 Just Dropped a 140-Band Nuclear Bomb
Breaking, Live, Music News

MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE, TOOL, LIMP BIZKIT And PIERCE THE VEIL To Headline 2026 AFTERSHOCK Festival Because Your Inner 2004 Just Called And Wants Its Playlist Back

Chord F. DiscordMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

Sacramento, CA – In a move that can only be described as “Y2K panic meets Hot Topic catalog,” Danny Wimmer…

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Latest posts

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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

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