Kristen Stewart’s The Chronology of Water Gets a New Trailer and It’s Still Not as Wet as Your Tears
🚨BREAKING: Kristen Stewart Ditches Vampires, Becomes Pretentious Auteur in Her Directorial Debut: AKA, How to Make Swimming Look Like a…
Tag: soul
The Elder Scrolls Online Announces 2026 Seasonal Model Because Paying for One Expansion Was Clearly Too Easy
🚨 BREAKING: The Elder Scrolls Online Just Dumped Its Entire Identity and Replaced It With a Loot Box Casino 🎰💥…
Warner Bros. Discovery board tells Paramount to take its revamped hostile takeover bid and shove it
Warner Bros. Discovery’s woke board once again spurns the evil capitalist Ellison family’s cash, choosing Netflix’s woke streaming agenda instead…
Business Acquisition Lunch & Learn: Where Sandwiches Are Served and Companies Are Devoured
🥸 Tired of your 9-5 soul-crushing gig? Good news! You too can drown in debt and existential dread by buying…
ROB HALFORD Hits 40 Years Without Booze Because Apparently Even Metal Gods Get Tired of Headbanging Into Walls
JUDAS PRIEST’s Rob Halford Celebrates 40 Years of Not Dying on a Tour Bus Like a Rock ‘n’ Roll Cliché…
BILLY GIBBONS Reveals ZZ TOP Almost Sold Their Souls for a Million Bucks and a Razor
🚨 BREAKING: Gillette Offers ZZ TOP $1 Million EACH to Shave Beards, Billy Gibbons Says “No Thanks, We Like Looking…
Business Ownership Summit: How to Fail Spectacularly in 2026 With the Perfectly Wrong Business
**In 2026, you could finally stop doomscrolling LinkedIn and become a “boss” — if you survive Beau Eckstein’s 2-hour sales…
Nita Strauss: The Melodic Death Metal Workout Queen Who Can’t Curl a Bicep Without Soilwork and At the Gates
When Nita Strauss Isn’t Shredding Guitars, She’s Shredding… Her Own Excuses (And Occasionally Her Soul on the Treadmill) 🎸🏋️♀️ In…
Report: The Witcher 3 Might Get A New DLC In May 2026—Because CD Projekt Really Missed Us Paying For More Than 10 Years
🚨 BREAKING: The Witcher 3 is Rising from the Grave Like a Reanimated Kikimora in May 2026 🧟♂️⚔️📅 Yes, you…
Venture Capitalists Begging You to Give Them Money
🚨 ATTENTION WANNABE ZUCKERBERGS! 🚨 Join our FREE online circus where you can learn to sell your soul to VCs…