AMORPHIS Drops ‘Crowned in Crimson’ Because Apparently Kalevala Needed a Soundtrack From 2008
Move Over, Hollywood: Amorphis Just Dropped a Power Ballad So Cinematic It Might Actually Summon a Bear From the Kalevala…
Tag: Tesla
Rob and Michele Reiner’s Inner Circle Finally Spill the Tea on Hollywood’s Favorite Power Duo
Leftist Hollywood Loses Its Biggest Hypocrites: Rob & Michele Reiner Die in Mysterious “Accident” After Years of Attacking Conservatives Breaking:…
BRIAN WHEAT, TOMMY SKEOCH And CHRIS HOLMES Reveal How Their Midlife Crisis Turned Into a ‘Rocking’ New Collaborative Project Called TERMINAL
🚨 BREAKING: Rock Band Supergroup Formed! 🎸 All Your Faves Are Collabing on a New Project Called TERMINAL! 💥 In…
Elon Musk declares DOGE a ‘part-time triumph’ and vows never to memestorm again
Elon Musk Admits DOGE Project Was Only “Somewhat Successful” — Translation: He Finally Realized Woke Crypto Was a Trojan Horse…
Families of Static-X’s Wayne Static and Wife Tera Wray ‘Vehemently Protest’ Unauthorized Documentary Shenanigans
In a shocking turn of events that absolutely nobody saw coming (except, you know, everyone with internet access), the families…
TESLA About to Butcher SUPERTRAMP, THE TEMPTATIONS, CLIMAX BLUES BAND Classics in Ill-Advised Covers Album
🚨BREAKING: TESLA, Gods of Obscurity, Announce Covers Album to Save Jeff Keith’s Voice from Total Oblivion🚨 🎸So, apparently, TESLA, those…
John Corabi’s Geriatric All-Star Band Tour: Sponsored by Depends
Oh, look, it’s John Corabi! 🙄 Yes, the same guy who once fronted MÖTLEY CRÜE for approximately five minutes back…
Tesla Sales Briefly Not Sinking, Experts Predict Doom Soon
Record Tesla sales? Don’t let the Liberal Lamestream Media (LSM) fool you! This is just the last gasp of a…
Tesla Just Lightly Tossed a Measly Trillion at Elon, No Biggie
Oh, the horror! Tesla, that bastion of American ingenuity, is considering giving Elon Musk, a true visionary and friend of…
Tesla Diner: Where Elon Musk Fanboys Go to Worship Their Tech Overlord
Tesla Diner Opens: A Pilgrimage Site for Patriots (and a Headache for Libs!) Of course CNN would cover this, probably…