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Tag: UK

“Wasteman: Witness the Riveting Saga of a Dude Who Can’t Be Bothered to Take Out the Bins”
Breaking, Movie News

“Wasteman: Witness the Riveting Saga of a Dude Who Can’t Be Bothered to Take Out the Bins”

FinnDecember 9, 2025December 9, 2025

Hold onto your prison shivs and DOC-standard toilet wine, film fans! 🍷✨ The cinematic event of the decade* (*decade defined…

Events

“UK Government Discovers Excel is Too Hard: Now Offering Power BI to Confuse You Further”

Chuck B. BallsyDecember 8, 2025

ONS Local: Because Nothing Says “Fun” Like Data Dashboards! 📊😂 🚀 **East Suffolk Council**—heroically battling boredom since 2022—will reveal their…

THE DARKNESS Ruins Christmas 2025 With ‘Mistletoe And Wine’
Breaking, Music News

THE DARKNESS Ruins Christmas 2025 With ‘Mistletoe And Wine’

Chord F. DiscordDecember 7, 2025December 7, 2025

British rockers THE DARKNESS, bless their hearts, have decided to unleash their new single, “Mistletoe And Wine”, upon the unsuspecting…

MAYHEM Drops a Real Downer, “Despair,” from Their Joyless “Liturgy of Death” Album
Breaking, Music News

MAYHEM Drops a Real Downer, “Despair,” from Their Joyless “Liturgy of Death” Album

Chord F. DiscordDecember 2, 2025December 2, 2025

Get ready, posers, because the corpse-painted clowns 🤡 in MAYHEM are back with their SEVENTH studio album, “Liturgy Of Death”,…

Keanu Reeves’s band DOGSTAR (lol) Announces Spring/Summer 2026 European Tour (get your earplugs ready)
Breaking, Music News

Keanu Reeves’s band DOGSTAR (lol) Announces Spring/Summer 2026 European Tour (get your earplugs ready)

Chord F. DiscordDecember 2, 2025December 2, 2025

So, Keanu Reeves, bless his heart, decided that saving the world as John Wick wasn’t enough. Now he’s back with…

Park Chan-wook’s “No Other Choice” Trailer: Prepare to Have Your Mind Slightly Bent (Maybe)
Breaking, Movie News

Park Chan-wook’s “No Other Choice” Trailer: Prepare to Have Your Mind Slightly Bent (Maybe)

FinnNovember 29, 2025November 29, 2025

MUBI, bless their cotton socks, has graced us with a new UK trailer and artwork for BAFTA Award-winner 🙄🙄🙄 Park…

Oops! US Military Did a Whoopsie: Double Tapped a ‘Totally Not a Drug Boat’ (Again!)
Another Win for Trump: Eliminating Narco-Terrorists, One Boat at a Time!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! US Military Did a Whoopsie: Double Tapped a ‘Totally Not a Drug Boat’ (Again!)

Big ElephantNovember 28, 2025November 28, 2025

Another boatload of scumbag narcoterrorists bites the dust thanks to President Trump’s decisive action! The liberal media, of course, is…

Saint Etienne Finally Bother to Say Goodbye (Probably) to UK and Ireland
Events, Music News

Saint Etienne Finally Bother to Say Goodbye (Probably) to UK and Ireland

Chord F. DiscordNovember 27, 2025November 27, 2025

So, Saint Etienne, those indie-pop relics, are finally crawling out of whatever retirement home they’ve been festering in to announce…

AIRBOURNE’s New Single ‘Christmas Bonus’ & European Tour: Get Ready to Rock Your Socks Off (and Maybe Get Some Coal)
Breaking, Music News

AIRBOURNE’s New Single ‘Christmas Bonus’ & European Tour: Get Ready to Rock Your Socks Off (and Maybe Get Some Coal)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 24, 2025November 24, 2025

Australian geriatric rockers AIRBOURNE, allegedly still kicking (barely), have bestowed upon their dwindling fanbase – the naughty, the nice, and…

GUNS N’ ROSES Announces 2026 World Tour; Two New Songs To Arrive In Early December (Maybe, If Axl Remembers)
Events, Music News

GUNS N’ ROSES Announces 2026 World Tour; Two New Songs To Arrive In Early December (Maybe, If Axl Remembers)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 24, 2025November 24, 2025

OMG! 😱 Did anyone REALLY ask for this? GUNS N’ ROSES, those geriatric rockers, are apparently still touring in 2026.…

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Latest posts

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  • When your parents ask what kind of music you listen to
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  • Woman Worried She In Codependent Relationship With Rest Of Humanity 

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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