Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Wish

Ace Frehley’s Brain Explodes: Life Support Update
Breaking, Music News

Ace Frehley’s Brain Explodes: Life Support Update

Chord F. DiscordOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨: According to TMZ.com, the one and only, the *legendary* (air quotes, people) KISS guitarist Ace Frehley is currently…

CHEAP TRICK Dumps ‘The Riff That Won’t Quit’ (Yeah Right) Single From Forthcoming ‘All Washed Up’ Album (Finally)
Breaking, Music News

CHEAP TRICK Dumps ‘The Riff That Won’t Quit’ (Yeah Right) Single From Forthcoming ‘All Washed Up’ Album (Finally)

Chord F. DiscordOctober 10, 2025October 10, 2025

Oh, great, more “rock” from the dinosaurs. CHEAP TRICK, those guys who haven’t been relevant since before your grandma was…

MY DYING BRIDE Finally Kicks Out Vocalist (Who Even Knew He Was Still In the Band?)
Breaking, Music News

MY DYING BRIDE Finally Kicks Out Vocalist (Who Even Knew He Was Still In the Band?)

Chord F. DiscordOctober 9, 2025October 9, 2025

MY DYING BRIDE, the band that makes funerals sound like a rave, has finally decided to ditch their lead singer,…

Ice Nine Kills Drools Over ’89 Batman, Churns Out Another Generic Track for Clueless Fanboys
Breaking, Music News

Ice Nine Kills Drools Over ’89 Batman, Churns Out Another Generic Track for Clueless Fanboys

Chord F. DiscordOctober 9, 2025October 9, 2025

ICE NINE KILLS, those maestros of musical mayhem, 🤡 invite you to “dance with the devil in the pale moonlight”…

Dee Snider and Lita Ford Ravage Missouri With Geriatric Rock Show, Locals Pray for Quieter Afterlife
Breaking, Music News

Dee Snider and Lita Ford Ravage Missouri With Geriatric Rock Show, Locals Pray for Quieter Afterlife

Chord F. DiscordOctober 5, 2025October 5, 2025

DEE SNIDER, the mouth that roared (or maybe just squeaked), graced Lita Ford’s stage on Friday, October 3, at The…

Niki de Saint Phalle’s Sleeper Hit Gets a 4K Facelift (Finally)
Live

Niki de Saint Phalle’s Sleeper Hit Gets a 4K Facelift (Finally)

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 26, 2025

**OMG! 7th House is gracing us with Niki de Saint Phalle’s “A DREAM LONGER THAN THE NIGHT” (aka *Un rêve…

Brazilian FM Claims Trump’s Brazil Intel Comes From Wish
Elephant Reads CNN

Brazilian FM Claims Trump’s Brazil Intel Comes From Wish

Big ElephantSeptember 23, 2025September 23, 2025

Oh, bless their hearts! The Brits are finally realizing who’s boss! Of course, it’s a “suck-up” – but in the…

Tokyo Game Show 2025: Prepare for Disappointment!
Games News, Live

Tokyo Game Show 2025: Prepare for Disappointment!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 21, 2025September 21, 2025

Oh, look, it’s that time of the year again! 🎉 Tokyo Game Show 2025 is gracing us with its 29th…

TWISTED SISTER Thinks It’s Still 1984, Announces Reunion Concert for 2026 (As If Anyone Cares)
Breaking, Movie News

TWISTED SISTER Thinks It’s Still 1984, Announces Reunion Concert for 2026 (As If Anyone Cares)

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 19, 2025September 19, 2025

TWISTED SISTER, those purveyors of fine 80s cheese 🧀, have apparently crawled out of whatever crypt they were hibernating in…

“Batman’s Most Important Scene: Prepare to Have Your Mind Mildly Bent”
Breaking, Movie News

“Batman’s Most Important Scene: Prepare to Have Your Mind Mildly Bent”

FinnSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Prepare yourselves, peasants, for the revelation of the *most important* Batman scene EVER! 🙄 You thought it was the death…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 9 10 11 12 Next

Latest posts

  • Kacey Musgraves Kicks Off Tour With Lube And Disco Balls
  • Olivia Rodrigo Drops Politically Charged Single Serena Joy On CD
  • Marilyn Manson and Rob Zombie in Tampa, FL (08/21/2026)
  • Police Chief Says Cop’s Spouse Found Dead, Founder Now Missing
  • Buckcherry Tour Bus Crashes in Deadly Multi Vehicle Accident

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.