Mike Portnoy Says Dream Theater Will Finally Remember How to Write Songs Again in Late 2026
Mike Portnoy, the drummer who left DREAM THEATER over a decade ago, has returned like a prodigal son who forgot…
Tag: Zombie
John Carpenter’s Toxic Commando (PC) Preview—When Your Graphics Card Cries for Help
Imagine a world where the only thing standing between you and total existential dread is a chainsaw, a chainsaw-wielding mutant,…
“Hold Onto Your Blocks: Minecraft’s New Barely-Controllable Pixel Beasts & MoJank’s Latest Recipe for Chaos!”
🐄 Hold onto your pickaxes, folks, because Minecraft just dropped its latest “content bomb”—Mounts of Mayhem™—and it’s precisely as chaotic…
Sheryl Sandberg Wonders Why Women Aren’t ‘Leaning In’ to the Corporate Nightmare Like They Used To—Is It the Zombie Apocalypse Vibes?
Hold onto your MAGA hats, folks, because Australia just declared war on FUN – and of course, CNN’s parroting it…
“2024 Survival Starter Pack: Stock Up on Grab Bags Before the Next Alien Invasion or Zombie Apocalypse (or Whatever Latest Doomsday Hoax)”
🚨BREAKING: Professors of Doom Lucy Easthope & Amanda Coleman host “How to Make Disasters Trendy” webinar 🚨 😂 On [insert…
‘War on Drugs’ Declared FINALLY Over, Trump Revives It Like a Zombie—Thanks, Obama
**CNN is at it again, folks, trying to make President Trump look like some kind of war-mongering drug lord. They…
Tommy Lee Gushes Over John 5: Guitar God or Just Really, Really Flammable
OMG! 🙄 Tommy Lee, bless his heart, is STILL talking about John 5 joining Mötley Crüe? Like, we GET it,…
“Oops, Baby Talk Too Complicated? Experts Host ‘Toddler-Speak’ Workshop for Grown-Ups Who Still Can’t Gibber”
🚨BREAKING: Adults to Learn How to Talk to Babies (Yes, Really)🚨 **📅 Nov 27, 2025**: Watch training videos (don’t worry,…
OMG! Bone Temple Trailer: Dr. Kelson vs Jimmy Crystal – 28 Years of Awkwardness
OMG! 😱 Sony Pictures just dropped the *second* trailer for 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple, and let’s be real,…
28 Years Later: The Bone Temple’s New Poster – Guaranteed to Bore You Less Than the Movie Itself
Oh, joy! Another sequel no one asked for! Expanding upon the cinematic ✨masterpiece✨ that Danny Boyle and Alex Garland graced…