“The Waterfront”: More Like “The Waste-of-Time-front”
The Waterfront’ gets a solid 5.5 out of 10 stars, which is basically the participation trophy of TV ratings. 🏆…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
Guy Who Can’t Settle Dispute Between His Toddlers Pretty Sure He Has This Israel-Iran Thing Solved
GRANDVIEW, MO — A local father who spent the entire day failing to settle a dispute between his toddlers later…
Sabrina Carpenter Undergoes State-Mandated Lobotomy To Cure Nymphomania
Read MoreThe OnionLOS ANGELES—Confirming that doctors had performed the procedure successfully, sources reported Friday that Sabrina Carpenter had undergone a…
Texan Republicans Tip Off State Department That Austin Has Nuclear Weapons
WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to sources within the Trump administration, Texas Republicans tipped off the State Department about the city…
Tom Cruise and a Bunch of Other Losers to Get Pity Oscars
OMG! 😱 The Academy is finally throwing a bone to Tom Cruise, giving him an Honorary Oscar! 🏆 You know,…
Man Returning From Near-Death Experience Recalls Angels Making Him Sign NDA
Read MoreThe OnionHOUSTON—Recounting the deeply spiritual event as one that was life-changing but contractually difficult to articulate, area man Kyle…
Technical Foul? WNBA Players Use Caitlin Clark’s Head As A Ball
INDIANAPOLIS, IN — Concerns over the harsh treatment endured by the league’s brightest and most popular star grew last night,…
Passengers At Gate Saddened By Poor Frightened Plane Loose Inside Airport
Read MoreThe OnionCHICAGO—Expressing concern that the small aircraft was going to accidentally hurt itself in its panic, passengers at O’Hare…
British Doctor Arrested For Misgendering Baby He Just Murdered
LONDON — Local obstetrician Doctor Roger Davidson was arrested this morning after he allegedly misgendered the baby he just finished…
Spaceballs 2: The Squeakquel – Because Original Ideas Are Hard
OMG! 😱 ‘Spaceballs 2’ is actually happening! Like, for realz? 🤣 I thought Mel Brooks was, like, a fossil by…