Trump Threatens To Defund Beauty Schools That Don’t Comply With MAGA Standards
Read MoreThe OnionWASHINGTON—After dispatching “Dear Colleague” letters to top cosmetology programs across the country, President Donald Trump threatened Monday to…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
‘My Work Doesn’t Define Me,’ Says Man Who Will Spend 90,000 Hours Of Lifetime At Office
Read MoreThe OnionSACRAMENTO, CA—Believing that he was establishing a firm line between who he was as a person and what…
Joe Biden Arrested For Harboring 11 Million Illegal Aliens
REHOBOTH BEACH, DE — Former President Joe Biden was placed under arrest today for harboring just over eleven million illegal…
Behold! New Babylon Bee Merch Has Arrived
Glad tidings! Your favorite fake news outlet just loaded up its store with BRAND NEW merch, and it’s all guaranteed…
Bella Ramsey Escapes Hate to Russian Social Media! What’s Behind Z and SVO? 🤔🔥
Bella Ramsey, The Last of Us, social media hate, Russian social networks VKontakte and Odnoklassniki, actress bullying, non-binary person, appearance…
Oh great, get ready for “Greyhound 2: Electric Boogaloo,” where Tom Hanks fights space pirates on a bus fueled by earnestness and Apple stock options 🙄🚌🍎🚀.
OMG! 😱 Tom Hanks, bless his cotton socks, is back for ‘Greyhound 2: Electric Boogaloo’! Because, you know, the first…
“The Legend of Ochi”: Prepare for a cinematic masterpiece so profound, it’ll make you question all your life choices 🐕🌲🤔.
So, apparently, some artsy-fartsy types over at Moviefone think “The Legend of Ochi” is worth a whopping 7.5 out of…
Trump Stuns Pope Funeral Attendees With Breathtaking Rendition Of ‘Ave Maria’
VATICAN CITY — In a stirring tribute to Pope Francis, President Donald Trump took to the microphone during the pontiff’s…
🤰 “Gestation” Video From “Alien: Earth” Will Ruin Pregnancy Forever – Baby Showers Will Never Be the Same! 😱
Well, buckle up, America, because FX has finally dropped the first explosive trailer for “Alien: Earth”—along with a poster that…
Shedeur Sanders Drafted By McDonald’s In 3rd Round
GREEN BAY, WI — After free falling out of the first two rounds, Shedeur Sanders finally heard his name called…