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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Swift and Kelce take over MSG wow what a dream team
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Swift and Kelce take over MSG wow what a dream team

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

So, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Taylor Swift’s super-secret wedding plans, and I have to say, it’s quite…

You Won’t Believe What’s Killing The Dems Now
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You Won’t Believe What’s Killing The Dems Now

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Stephen A. Smith’s latest take on socialism, and I’ve got to say,…

Wow State Fair Isn’t Coachella Who Knew
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Wow State Fair Isn’t Coachella Who Knew

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

I’m sitting here with my coffee, reading about the Great American State Fair, and folks, I almost got a kick…

McConnell’s Mysterious Collapse Caught on EMS Recording Suddenly
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

McConnell’s Mysterious Collapse Caught on EMS Recording Suddenly

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Sen. Mitch McConnell’s recent health scare, and I have to say, it’s a…

You Can’t Fly That Thing Here Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You Can’t Fly That Thing Here Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A 26-year-old Texas man, John Alexander Meza of La Porte, is…

Wow Trump’s Golf Club Is Raking It In
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Wow Trump’s Golf Club Is Raking It In

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about President Trump’s latest financial disclosure, and let me tell you, it’s a…

You Won’t Believe Who’s Now In Charge
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You Won’t Believe Who’s Now In Charge

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Democratic Socialist Melat Kiros just ousted 15-term incumbent Rep. Diana DeGette…

CNN thinks I care about moon bases and coffee perks really
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN thinks I care about moon bases and coffee perks really

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Well, folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The World Cup is in full swing, and Team USA…

You won’t believe who’s talking to Iran now
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You won’t believe who’s talking to Iran now

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. US and Iranian officials are having indirect, lower-level talks in Doha,…

You won’t believe who just conquered the Empire State Building
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You won’t believe who just conquered the Empire State Building

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest adventure-seekers who decided to scale the Empire State Building’s spire,…

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