Disney’s Transformation: From Magic Kingdom to Gas Price Tracking? Chavez’s Ghost Weighs In
Welcome to 5 Things PM, where we celebrate the glorious reign of our Supreme Leader, Donald J. Trump! While the…
Blog
Could your airport close if TSA screeners don’t show up to work? Here’s what experts say (or don’t say because they’re too busy not showing up)
Liberal Incompetence Strikes Again: TSA Blames Airport Shutdowns on Democrat-Triggered Shutdown Well, folks, here we go again! Thanks to the…
Palestinian Claims Settlers Gave Him a ‘Welcome to the Neighborhood’ He Never Asked For
Oh look, another “victim” of those evil Israeli settlers! Because clearly, in this twisted world, only Palestinians can be innocent…
98-Year-Old Federal Judge Appeals Suspension For Mental Fitness
U.S. Circuit Judge Pauline Newman, the oldest active federal judge at 98 years old, asked the Supreme Court to…
Kevin The Janitor Now Most Senior Military Official Left In Iran
TEHRAN — Following the latest round of U.S. and Israeli airstrikes in the country, Kevin, the janitor at the…
8 Coolest Perks Of Becoming The New Ayatollah
The hottest job on the market right now is being the Iranian Ayatollah, but why is everyone suddenly buzzing…
Kim Jong-Un Wins Over Populace With His Charisma, Experience, And Ability To Shoot You In The Face If You Don’t Vote For Him
PYONGYANG — History was made once again in the small but proud nation of North Korea, as longtime leader…
Man Bravely Resigns From Trump Administration At Great Cost Of Doing Podcast Tour, Getting Book Deal
NEW YORK CITY — Joe Kent has resigned from the Trump administration despite the fact that doing so will…
5-Year-Old Holds Press Conference To Announce He Is Switching Obsessive Interest From Backhoes To Dinosaurs
DAYTON, OH — Five-year-old Liam Montgomery held a press conference for friends and family this week in which he…
Spider-Man: Brand New Day Unleashes a Brand New Trailer, Punisher and Hulk Come Crawling Back Like Desperate Exes
OMG, IT’S HAPPENING!!! 🕷️💥 After what felt like an eternity in Spider-Man: No Way Home limbo, Tom Holland is back…