Roomful Of Pedophiles Protest ICE Deporting Pedophiles
LOS ANGELES, CA — A room full of pedophiles in attendance at Sunday night’s Grammys ceremony defiantly protested Trump’s…
Category: Babylon Bee
Tearful Trump Ends Deportations After Seeing Celebrities Wearing ‘ICE OUT’ Pins
WASHINGTON, D.C. — A tearful President Trump has reportedly issued a halt on all deportations and ordered the immediate…
Sandwich Ruined After Not Being Cut In Triangles
U.S. — What had been expected to be a delightful lunch was thrown into chaos and threatened to destroy…
Republican, Democrat Party Platforms Now Just Lists Of People They Would Arrest
U.S. — The political system in the United States took a sharp turn away from addressing practical issues facing…
Finally: Newsom Announces Finished Construction Of High-Speed Rail Between His House And French Laundry
SACRAMENTO, CA — Governor Newsom announced today that construction has wrapped on the long anticipated high speed rail project,…
Dad Fervently Prays For Daughter To Have Case Of Moderate Acne From Ages 14-23
ARVADA, CO — Local dad Craig Smith has spent the past year fervently praying that his daughter Claire will…
Quiz: Tell Us How You Take Your Coffee And We’ll Tell You What Gender You Are
Read More FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer,…
Damning Photos Surface Of Clippy On Epstein Island
U.S. — The new trove of Epstein documents has revealed damning photos of Microsoft’s former assistant “Clippy” visiting Epstein…
Report: Zucchini Not Bad After Covering It With Flour And Seasoning And Frying Out All Of The Taste
U.S. — A new report out of Harvard University indicated that zucchini actually isn’t that bad after covering it…
Experts Warn Arresting Journalists Could Be Slippery Slope To Arresting Politicians And Other People Who Deserve It
U.S. — Self-proclaimed journalist Don Lemon was arrested on Friday for allegedly raiding a church service and intimidating its…