Aisha Wahab somehow defeats money avalanche to win House seat
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Democratic state Sen. Aisha Wahab is projected to win the special…
Category: Breaking
Navy Mulls Renaming Ship After Trump Because Priorities
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The US Navy is considering renaming an aircraft carrier that was…
Brother begs America to care about sibling stuck in China
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. An American scholar, Min Zin, has been detained in China since…
New York Capitol Bomb Plot Foiled Because Terrorism Is So Basic
Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about a 35-year-old woman, Jessica Bowie, who’s been charged with plotting to blow…
Because What the World Needed Was a Record-Breaking Odyssey Remake Sequel
The Odyssey has officially become the highest-grossing R-rated movie in Hollywood history, with a whopping $1.35 billion in worldwide ticket…
Because You Clearly Haven’t Seen Enough MCU Movies Already Avengers Doomsday
Avengers: Doomsday is still months away, but Marvel is already trying to prepare you for the impending doom. The movie’s…
Jennings Suddenly Front Runner For Soul Crushing Press Secretary Job
Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the potential new White House press secretary, and let me tell you,…
BUSH still exists and is rehashing old stuff again
Oh boy, are you guys ready for some completely unnecessary nostalgia? 🎉 BUSH’s album “The Sea Of Memories” is getting…
Wolves In The Throne Room Finally Make Album For Treehugging Hipsters
Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic USBM? 🤘 Because WOLVES IN THE THRONE ROOM just dropped the…
Alaska Trial Run Ends Predictably For Democrats
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Alaska primary results are in, and it looks like Democratic…