Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

Dem Congressman Calls Out Rubio’s Chicken Hawk Routine Over Maduro Drama
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Dem Congressman Calls Out Rubio’s Chicken Hawk Routine Over Maduro Drama

Big ElephantJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Another Day, Another Snowflake Democrat Melts Down Over American Strength In a stunning display of liberal fragility, Iraq War veteran…

Code Vein II Producer Keita Iizuka Explains How Time Travel Factors In
Breaking, Games News

Code Vein II Producer Keita Iizuka Explains How Time Travel Factors In

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Oh great, another cash grab disguised as “innovation” in gaming. Buckle up, you degenerates, because Bandai Namco just dropped the…

Venezuela’s New Leader Might Just Out-Maduro Maduro, Says Opposition Politician
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Venezuela’s New Leader Might Just Out-Maduro Maduro, Says Opposition Politician

Big ElephantJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Leftist Media Panics Over Venezuela as Trump’s Tough Stance Threatens Their Socialist Paradise In a stunning display of liberal hypocrisy,…

5 Things to Know for Jan. 5: Venezuela’s Drama, Airspace Meltdowns, Congress Still Can’t Agree on Coffee, California’s Floods and a Swiss Bar That Burned Down Like Your Hopes and Dreams
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things to Know for Jan. 5: Venezuela’s Drama, Airspace Meltdowns, Congress Still Can’t Agree on Coffee, California’s Floods and a Swiss Bar That Burned Down Like Your Hopes and Dreams

Big ElephantJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Breaking News: Gas Prices to Plummet in 2026 – Thanks to Trump’s Mighty Hand The once-dreaded gas pump is finally…

This is Bigger Than Oil, It’s About the New US National Security Strategy Says Meyer Resources CEO
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

This is Bigger Than Oil, It’s About the New US National Security Strategy Says Meyer Resources CEO

Big ElephantJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Breaking: U.S. Oil Giants Eye Venezuela Amid ‘Globalist Elite’ Plot to Steal Our Energy Independence – Again! In a stunning…

Code Vein II Preview – A Stylish Soulslike That Leans Fully Into Its Anime Excess
Breaking, Games News

Code Vein II Preview – A Stylish Soulslike That Leans Fully Into Its Anime Excess

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Move over, Dark Souls, there’s a new vampire in town, and it’s here to steal your heart—literally. 🧛‍♂️💔 Code Vein…

HAKEN Fires Guitarist and Bassist for Not Being Able to Play While Juggling
Breaking, Music News

HAKEN Fires Guitarist and Bassist for Not Being Able to Play While Juggling

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: HAKEN LOSES TWO MEMBERS, GAINS TWO MORE EXCUSES TO REWRITE THEIR SETLIST 🚨 😱🎸 In a move that…

EXTREME Finally Decides to Make Another Album (Yes, They’re Still a Thing)
Breaking, Music News

EXTREME Finally Decides to Make Another Album (Yes, They’re Still a Thing)

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: EXTREME ANNOUNCES SEVENTH ALBUM AFTER ONLY 3 YEARS OF SILENCE (A RECORD FOR THEM) 🚨 In a shocking…

Pentagon Slashes Mark Kelly’s Pension Because He Dared to Speak Truth to Power (Or Just Made a Video)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Pentagon Slashes Mark Kelly’s Pension Because He Dared to Speak Truth to Power (Or Just Made a Video)

Big ElephantJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Trump’s Pentagon Declares War on Retired Navy Captain for Daring to Tell Troops to Obey the Law In a stunning…

Matt Damon and Ben Affleck Reunite to Prove They Still Know How to Pretend To Be Tough Guys
Breaking, Movie News

Matt Damon and Ben Affleck Reunite to Prove They Still Know How to Pretend To Be Tough Guys

FinnJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: Ben Affleck and Matt Damon Have Finally Reunited to Solve the World’s Most Pressing Mystery — Where Did…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 385 386 387 … 608 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Administration Gets Sued For Being Super Cool To Animals
  • Oh Joy Another Cold War Thriller to Make You Feel Like You’re Stuck in a Time Loop of Spy Movies
  • TIFF 2026 Review: Hope – “because who needs a decent plot when the cinematography is on point and the fancy camera angles will distract you from the crushing existential dread”
  • Bitcoin Thief Somehow Manages To Not Get Away With It
  • César Chavez Nonprofits Apparently Forgot About The Whole Helping People Part

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.