Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

GWAR’s 40th: Streaming From the Hellmouth (Because VEEPS Pays the Bills)
Breaking, Music News

GWAR’s 40th: Streaming From the Hellmouth (Because VEEPS Pays the Bills)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Behold, feeble humans! Your 👽alien overlords in GWAR, those pioneers of making music that sounds like a garbage truck falling…

Atari and Bandai Namco Team Up to Milking Pac-Man’s Ghostly Corpse for Cash Grab Console and DLC
Breaking, Games News

Atari and Bandai Namco Team Up to Milking Pac-Man’s Ghostly Corpse for Cash Grab Console and DLC

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

**Waka waka waka 🤪! Prepare your wallets, fellow gamers, because Atari and Bandai Namco are BACK, baby, to milk the…

HATEBREED Drops New Banger ‘Make The Demons Obey’ After Half a Decade, Demons Tremble in Fear
Breaking, Music News

HATEBREED Drops New Banger ‘Make The Demons Obey’ After Half a Decade, Demons Tremble in Fear

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Ah, HATEBREED, those stalwarts of Connecticut hardcore/metal (is there even a difference anymore?🤔), have finally graced us with new music…

Dying Light 2: Stay Bleak – We Played It So You Don’t Have To
Breaking, Games News

Dying Light 2: Stay Bleak – We Played It So You Don’t Have To

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Oh, honey, guess what? I got PAID to hang out in sunny Los Angeles with a bunch of other “journalists”…

GHOST: Apparently People Can’t Follow Simple Instructions, Film Band on Phones Anyway
Breaking, Music News

GHOST: Apparently People Can’t Follow Simple Instructions, Film Band on Phones Anyway

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

OMG 😱! Some dude filmed GHOST playing “Square Hammer” in Philly on July 19th. Like, who even uses phones anymore?…

Marvel Knew Kang Was a Joke Before ‘Quantumania’ Even Hit Theaters
Breaking, Movie News

Marvel Knew Kang Was a Joke Before ‘Quantumania’ Even Hit Theaters

FinnJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Okay, so remember when Marvel Studios acted like they had a CLUE what they were doing in the early MCU…

Fortnite Accidentally Leaks Crappy Fantastic Four Skins on Twitter, Nobody Cares
Breaking, Games News

Fortnite Accidentally Leaks Crappy Fantastic Four Skins on Twitter, Nobody Cares

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

😂OMG! Fortnite, the game that refuses to die, is collabing with the Fantastic Four? 🙄Seriously? As if we needed more…

WEDNESDAY 13 Proves Funerals Can Be a Blast With New “Rotting Away” Music Video
Breaking, Music News

WEDNESDAY 13 Proves Funerals Can Be a Blast With New “Rotting Away” Music Video

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Behold! During his totally epic “Summer Blood Storm” European tour (because blood storms are TOTALLY a thing, right? 🙄), Wednesday…

Mike Shinoda: I Had Other Plans For Linkin Park (Like a Reunion Tour with a Hologram Chester)
Breaking, Music News

Mike Shinoda: I Had Other Plans For Linkin Park (Like a Reunion Tour with a Hologram Chester)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 20, 2025July 20, 2025

OMG, you guys! LINKIN PARK, the band that peaked in 2000, is still trying to be relevant! Mike Shinoda, bless…

Witness the Sheer Genius of METALLICA’s ‘M72’ Tour (feat Video Nerds and a Thingy Called PIXERA)
Breaking, Music News

Witness the Sheer Genius of METALLICA’s ‘M72’ Tour (feat Video Nerds and a Thingy Called PIXERA)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 20, 2025July 20, 2025

METALLICA, those lovable dinosaurs of thrash 🦖, are apparently still touring. And get this, their “M72” tour, which sounds suspiciously…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 517 518 519 … 600 Next

Latest posts

  • Macklemore Stands By Pro-Palestine Comments Amid Backlash
  • TRUTH SOCIAL DISPATCH Donald Trump posts on September 7 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social September 7 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump blasts Center for American Progress over crime report
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald Trump demands photo ID and citizenship proof for voters

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.