Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: action

Nation’s Water Now As Secure As Your Aunt’s Facebook Account
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Nation’s Water Now As Secure As Your Aunt’s Facebook Account

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest cyberattack on US water systems, and I have to say,…

Fed Admits They Probably Should Have Raised Those Rates Already
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fed Admits They Probably Should Have Raised Those Rates Already

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the Fed’s latest move, and let me tell you, it’s a real…

Stupid Never Dies slated for October with obligatory DLC and cash-grab editions
Breaking, Games News

Stupid Never Dies slated for October with obligatory DLC and cash-grab editions

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 30, 2026July 30, 2026

It’s time to get excited, and also mildly skeptical, about the upcoming game Stupid Never Dies. I mean, who doesn’t…

Oh Great Another Zombie Movie to Add to the Pile of Unoriginal Ideas from Some Guy Named Yeon Sang-ho Who Probably Thinks Zombies Are Still Scary
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Great Another Zombie Movie to Add to the Pile of Unoriginal Ideas from Some Guy Named Yeon Sang-ho Who Probably Thinks Zombies Are Still Scary

FinnJuly 30, 2026July 30, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for another super original and not-at-all-overdone zombie movie? 🙄 Because I’ve got some “breaking…

Sony rescues remnants of your attention with Dying Light 2, other somewhat decent games
Breaking, Games News

Sony rescues remnants of your attention with Dying Light 2, other somewhat decent games

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 30, 2026July 30, 2026

PlayStation Plus is at it again, dumping a fresh batch of games into our laps like a benevolent gaming overlord,…

Republicans Finally Find Something They Don’t Like
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Republicans Finally Find Something They Don’t Like

Big ElephantJuly 30, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my morning coffee and reading about the latest drama in Washington, and let me tell you, it’s…

Because You Clearly Needed Another Jumanji Sequel To Fill Void In Soul
Breaking, Movie News

Because You Clearly Needed Another Jumanji Sequel To Fill Void In Soul

FinnJuly 30, 2026July 30, 2026

The wait is over, and the trailer for Jumanji: Open World has finally arrived, because what the world really needed…

Flocking To The Competition Apparently Works
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Flocking To The Competition Apparently Works

Big ElephantJuly 30, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading about the backlash against Flock Safety cameras. It seems like people all over…

Trump Takes On Dulles Airport Because Why Not At This Point
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Takes On Dulles Airport Because Why Not At This Point

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. President Donald Trump has unveiled a major renovation plan for Dulles…

Delta Pilots Get Exciting Game of Chicken With Air Traffic Control
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Delta Pilots Get Exciting Game of Chicken With Air Traffic Control

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about a close call at Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport, and let me tell…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 25 26 27 … 92 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Drops Bombshell Evidence Biden Actively Campaigned Against Him
  • Raconteurs Unveil Broken Boy Soldiers 20th Anniversary Vault Package
  • Democrats Use Epstein Victim’s Family in Slick New Ad Campaign
  • Doechii, Phoebe Bridgers, Fontaines D.C. Top Primavera Sound Anniversary Bill
  • Biden and Trump Unite For World Peace Apparently

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.