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Tag: Ally

SGF 2026: Hot Wheels Infinite Rush Preview—Because You Clearly Didn’t Spend Enough Time Playing with Toy Cars as a Kid and Now You Get to Do It Virtually and Smash Stuff
Breaking, Games News

SGF 2026: Hot Wheels Infinite Rush Preview—Because You Clearly Didn’t Spend Enough Time Playing with Toy Cars as a Kid and Now You Get to Do It Virtually and Smash Stuff

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 15, 2026June 15, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys in for a treat! 🎉 My first official Summer Game Fest hands-on appointment was with…

XANDRIA Finally Decides to Release Some Actual Music Instead of Just Reheating the Same Old Power Ballads for the 12 People Who Still Listen to Symphonic Metal ‘Colours’ Single Dropping Like a Hot Potato From Upcoming ‘Eclipse’ Album Because Who Needs a Social Life Anyway
Breaking, Music News

XANDRIA Finally Decides to Release Some Actual Music Instead of Just Reheating the Same Old Power Ballads for the 12 People Who Still Listen to Symphonic Metal ‘Colours’ Single Dropping Like a Hot Potato From Upcoming ‘Eclipse’ Album Because Who Needs a Social Life Anyway

Chord F. DiscordJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

🎸👀 Get ready for the most epic symphonic metal album of the century! 🎶🔥 German symphonic metallers XANDRIA will release…

Events

Get Ready for the Most Thrilling Thing Youll Ever do on ZOOM Prof Ally Sasss Memoir Writing Workshop to Fix Your Boring Life

Chuck B. BallsyMay 29, 2026

🎉 Write your masterpiece… or not 🤣 When: Wednesdays 7:00pm-9:30pm EST on ZOOM, June 3rd-July 22nd 📅 Email Ally at…

Get Ready for the Most Underwhelming Experience of Your Life: Xbox Showcase Today Will Probably Delay Project Helix Again
Breaking, Events, Games News

Get Ready for the Most Underwhelming Experience of Your Life: Xbox Showcase Today Will Probably Delay Project Helix Again

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

Get ready for the most epic, life-changing, and totally-not-overhyped announcement in gaming history: the next generation of Xbox is coming!…

ROG Xbox Ally Finally Decides to Show Up Fashionably Late with a Bunch of Updates That Will Probably Break Something Else
Breaking, Games News

ROG Xbox Ally Finally Decides to Show Up Fashionably Late with a Bunch of Updates That Will Probably Break Something Else

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

The ROG Xbox Ally is getting a new set of updates, because who doesn’t love a good update, am I…

Latest posts

  • THE ORANGE ORACLE UNLEASHES MIDDLE EAST MIRACLE WITH IRAN DEAL
  • SKILLET To Finally Release Something New Because You’ve All Been Clamoring For More Of The Same Old Stuff In July; ‘Comatose: 20 Years, Still Screaming Tour’ To Launch This Fall Because They Still Can’t Sell Out A Decent Venue
  • Trump vows to punish scum who trashed our great nation’s pool
  • Steam Machine Pricing and Reservations Are Finally Here Because You Clearly Haven’t Spent Enough Money on Overpriced PC Hardware Already
  • Get Ready for Some Pretentious Discussions About Magnifica Humanitas That Will Change Your Life Forever Possibly Maybe

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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