Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Anthrax

NEW ANTHRAX ALBUM NOW DELAYED UNTIL 2026 β€” BECAUSE WHO NEEDS MUSIC ANYWAY? FIRST SINGLE DROPS IN MAY IF THE BAND MEMBERS REMEMBER WHAT YEAR IT IS
Breaking, Music News

NEW ANTHRAX ALBUM NOW DELAYED UNTIL 2026 β€” BECAUSE WHO NEEDS MUSIC ANYWAY? FIRST SINGLE DROPS IN MAY IF THE BAND MEMBERS REMEMBER WHAT YEAR IT IS

Chord F. DiscordMarch 19, 2026March 19, 2026

In an interview with Australia’s Everblack podcast, ANTHRAX drummer Charlie Benante spoke about the band’s long-awaited new studio album, which…

IRON MAIDEN: Gridiron Glory Forces Metal Mayhem to Move, Leaving L.A. Fans in a Headbanging Frenzy Over Football’s Bold Field Takeover
Oh no, the mighty IRON MAIDEN is being held hostage by college football β€” who knew the Trojans were such metalheads? 🎸🏈
Breaking, Music News

IRON MAIDEN: Gridiron Glory Forces Metal Mayhem to Move, Leaving L.A. Fans in a Headbanging Frenzy Over Football’s Bold Field Takeover

Chord F. DiscordMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

In a shocking turn of events that has fans more confused than a bassist trying to count in 7/8 time,…

Watch: ANTHRAX Unleashes Ear-Rape Symphony on Unsuspecting Canadians – Prepare Thy Earholes for the Musical Equivalent of a Rusty Chainsaw Massacre!
ANTHRAX Fans, Prepare Your Wallets and Your Patience β€” New Album Finally Coming... Maybe
Breaking, Music News

Watch: ANTHRAX Unleashes Ear-Rape Symphony on Unsuspecting Canadians – Prepare Thy Earholes for the Musical Equivalent of a Rusty Chainsaw Massacre!

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 27, 2026February 27, 2026

Oh boy, get ready to dust off your battle jackets and dig out those air guitars, because ANTHRAX is teasing…

EXODUS Unleashes ‘Goliath’ Title Track Music Video – Because the World Needed More Epic Biblical References
EXODUS Announces "Goliath" Album, Fans Prepare for Mosh Pit Retirement
Breaking, Music News

EXODUS Unleashes ‘Goliath’ Title Track Music Video – Because the World Needed More Epic Biblical References

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 18, 2026February 18, 2026

The Bay Area thrash titans EXODUS have finally unveiled their twelfth studio album, “Goliath,” scheduled for release on March 20,…

ANTHRAX Fans Can Finally Start Panicking: New Album Slated for May 2026, According to Frank Bello’s Watch
Breaking, Music News

ANTHRAX Fans Can Finally Start Panicking: New Album Slated for May 2026, According to Frank Bello’s Watch

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 11, 2026February 11, 2026

ANTHRAX, the thrash metal veterans who probably have more riffs in their back pocket than some bands have Instagram followers,…

ZAKK WYLDE: “PANTERA Reunion? Only If PHILIP ANSELMO And REX BROWN Can Handle DIMEBAG’s Ghost Riffs”
Breaking, Music News

ZAKK WYLDE: “PANTERA Reunion? Only If PHILIP ANSELMO And REX BROWN Can Handle DIMEBAG’s Ghost Riffs”

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 5, 2026February 5, 2026

Oh look, it’s PANTERA: The Phantom Reunion, starring Zakk Wylde as “The Guy Who’s Not Dimebag” and Charlie Benante as…

ACID REIGN Unleashes New Album, ‘Daze Of The Week’, Because Apparently We Need More Chaos in May
Breaking, Music News

ACID REIGN Unleashes New Album, ‘Daze Of The Week’, Because Apparently We Need More Chaos in May

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 31, 2026January 31, 2026

ACID REIGN Returns to Melt Faces with “Daze Of The Week” – Because Apparently 2019 Wasn’t Confusing Enough U.K. thrash…

Watch: URIAH HEEP Celebrates 50 Years of Existence by Finally Getting Rid of Their Only Remaining Original Member, Mick Box
Breaking, Music News

Watch: URIAH HEEP Celebrates 50 Years of Existence by Finally Getting Rid of Their Only Remaining Original Member, Mick Box

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 24, 2026January 24, 2026

Uriah Heep Kicks Off Scandinavian ‘Magician’s Farewell’ Tour in Tampereβ€”Because Even Legends Need a Nap 😴🎸 In a move that…

STONE SOUR guitarist JOSH RAND’s THE L.I.F.E. PROJECT promises you a full-length album… right after the heat death of the universe in 2026
Breaking, Music News

STONE SOUR guitarist JOSH RAND’s THE L.I.F.E. PROJECT promises you a full-length album… right after the heat death of the universe in 2026

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 21, 2026January 21, 2026

In the thunderous, eternal battle against the ever-looming threat of having actual release dates, THE L.I.F.E. PROJECT has emerged victorious…

EXODUS Finds Brand New, Unheard-of Way to Write Riffs, Names Band After a Big Guy
Breaking, Music News

EXODUS Finds Brand New, Unheard-of Way to Write Riffs, Names Band After a Big Guy

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 21, 2026January 21, 2026

Hold onto your studded leather jackets and prepare your necks for the ultimate whiplash, because the thrash titans known as…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 2 3 … 6 Next

Latest posts

  • Why Hollywood Keeps Making the Same Movies Over and Over
  • Tony Iommi still making riffs because what else is he gonna do
  • Lollapalooza 2026 Sizzles with Jennie and Wolf Alice Sets
  • Phil Collins Near Death Scare in 2024 Due to Excessive Drinking
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Trump Wins Bedminster Club Championship With Score of 70

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright Β© 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.