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Tag: breaking

“Another Simple Favor”: Or, How Blake Lively Robbed Me of Two Hours I’ll Never Get Back 🙄🎬
Breaking

“Another Simple Favor”: Or, How Blake Lively Robbed Me of Two Hours I’ll Never Get Back 🙄🎬

FinnMay 2, 2025May 2, 2025

So, ‘Another Simple Favor’ got a whopping 7 out of 10 stars, huh? 🙄 Must be a slow news day.…

So, Captain Planet and the guy who sang “Vienna” are flogging a Live Aid musical album – because the 80s weren’t embarrassing enough the first time around 🙄🎶
Breaking

So, Captain Planet and the guy who sang “Vienna” are flogging a Live Aid musical album – because the 80s weren’t embarrassing enough the first time around 🙄🎶

Chord F. DiscordMay 2, 2025May 2, 2025

Just For One Day – The Live Aid Musical album has been unleashed upon the world, like a rogue glitter…

OMG, Green Day gets a participation trophy 🌟 on the Hollywood Walk of Fame – guess anyone can be a “star” these days 🙄
Breaking

OMG, Green Day gets a participation trophy 🌟 on the Hollywood Walk of Fame – guess anyone can be a “star” these days 🙄

Chord F. DiscordMay 1, 2025May 1, 2025

OMG! 🙄 Green Day, those purveyors of slightly-more-than-mediocre punk-ish anthems, FINALLY got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame!…

Yeehaw! Saddle up for a totally objective and definitely not rage-baiting list of country music’s biggest hat-wearers from the last quarter-century! 🤠🎤🚜
Breaking

Yeehaw! Saddle up for a totally objective and definitely not rage-baiting list of country music’s biggest hat-wearers from the last quarter-century! 🤠🎤🚜

Chuck B. BallsyMay 1, 2025May 1, 2025

Behold, peasants! Gather ’round and witness the definitive, unimpeachably correct, and utterly objective list of the 26 “Most Important” Country…

Lemmy gets another statue in Stoke-On-Trent because one wasn’t nearly metal enough 🤘😂
Breaking

Lemmy gets another statue in Stoke-On-Trent because one wasn’t nearly metal enough 🤘😂

Chord F. DiscordMay 1, 2025May 1, 2025

Oh my gawd, you guize! 😱 They’re actually doing it! They’re building a monument to Lemmy in Stoke-on-Trent. Stoke-on-freaking-Trent! 🤣…

The Sword, bless their hearts, are dusting off “Warp Riders” for a 15th-anniversary tour, because apparently time (and riffs) forgot that album existed 🤷‍♂️🎸🚀
Breaking

The Sword, bless their hearts, are dusting off “Warp Riders” for a 15th-anniversary tour, because apparently time (and riffs) forgot that album existed 🤷‍♂️🎸🚀

Chord F. DiscordMay 1, 2025May 1, 2025

Behold, the geriatric Texan riff-lords, THE SWORD, have dusted off their amplifiers and emerged from whatever retirement home they were…

Igor Cavalera Claims Brazilian Metalheads Were Just Trolling Grandma With Satanic Stuff 🤘😂👵
Breaking

Igor Cavalera Claims Brazilian Metalheads Were Just Trolling Grandma With Satanic Stuff 🤘😂👵

Chord F. DiscordMay 1, 2025April 30, 2025

OMG! 😱 Iggor Cavalera, the dude who used to hit things in Sepultura (before they became, like, *totally* irrelevant), just…

“No Rest for the Wicked” devs claim their “Breach Update” is totally new, but really it’s just more of the same, amirite? 🙄😂🔥
Breaking

“No Rest for the Wicked” devs claim their “Breach Update” is totally new, but really it’s just more of the same, amirite? 🙄😂🔥

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 1, 2025April 30, 2025

Alright gamers, listen up! No Rest for the Wicked, that game that’s trying to be Dark Souls but also Diablo…

Bruce Dickinson 👴🏻 Still at it? 🎤🎸 18 Songs of flight ✈️ (delayed ‘Til 2026 🗓️, Obviously 🙄).
Breaking

Bruce Dickinson 👴🏻 Still at it? 🎤🎸 18 Songs of flight ✈️ (delayed ‘Til 2026 🗓️, Obviously 🙄).

Chord F. DiscordApril 30, 2025April 30, 2025

So, Bruce Dickinson, AKA the air raid siren from IRON MAIDEN (the band your dad probably listens to), decided to…

OMG, Marvel Rivals is giving Winter Soldier a Thunderbolts makeover and throwing a Hellfire Gala, because apparently, that’s what the game was MISSING 💅🔥🤡
Breaking

OMG, Marvel Rivals is giving Winter Soldier a Thunderbolts makeover and throwing a Hellfire Gala, because apparently, that’s what the game was MISSING 💅🔥🤡

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 30, 2025April 30, 2025

Oh, honey, hold my vibranium shield! 🛡️ Marvel Rivals, that game we all *totally* play and *aren’t* just pretending to…

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