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Tag: competition

Zillow paid Redfin HOW MUCH to be its online rental listing minion?!
Elephant Reads CNN

Zillow paid Redfin HOW MUCH to be its online rental listing minion?!

Big ElephantSeptember 30, 2025September 30, 2025

Another day, another deep dive into the swamp! The FTC, probably staffed with a bunch of radical leftist Bernie bros,…

ANTHRAX Guitarist Desperate Much? Begs Ex-Singer for Bandmate
Live

ANTHRAX Guitarist Desperate Much? Begs Ex-Singer for Bandmate

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 19, 2025September 19, 2025

Oh, sweet Zombie Jesus, John Bush is back! šŸŽ¤ Yes, you heard it right, the dude who tried to replace…

‘Highlander’ Reboot Gets the Chop (Literally!) After Superman Trips Over a Sword
Breaking, Movie News

‘Highlander’ Reboot Gets the Chop (Literally!) After Superman Trips Over a Sword

FinnSeptember 12, 2025September 12, 2025

So, apparently, Superman himself, Henry Cavill, got a boo-boo while playing with swords āš”ļø and kilts in preparation for the…

‘The Conjuring: Last Rites’ Scares Up Third-Highest Opening—Are We Really Still Doing This
Elephant Reads CNN

‘The Conjuring: Last Rites’ Scares Up Third-Highest Opening—Are We Really Still Doing This

Big ElephantSeptember 7, 2025September 7, 2025

Another weekend, another victory for REAL American values at the box office! “The Conjuring: Last Rites” scared the pants off…

Melania’s Back: This Time It’s Robots, Not Just Her Husband
Elephant Reads CNN

Melania’s Back: This Time It’s Robots, Not Just Her Husband

Big ElephantSeptember 4, 2025September 4, 2025

Oh, great, Melania deigns to grace us with her presence. After MONTHS of hiding, our First Lady emerges to warn…

Walt Disney World Announces Things (As If We Care) During Play ā€˜n Preview (Yawn)
Live

Walt Disney World Announces Things (As If We Care) During Play ā€˜n Preview (Yawn)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 3, 2025September 3, 2025

So, CGM (whoever they are šŸ¤”) graced Walt Disney World’s Play ‘n Preview event with their presence (third row, no…

The Gigglepocalypse
Live

The Gigglepocalypse

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 1, 2025

**Dekeys, a comedian who stumbled onto the stagešŸ˜‚, not from passion, but because his friends were too polite to tell…

5 MMO Features So Good, They’ll Steal Your Life Savings and Social Life
Breaking, Games News

5 MMO Features So Good, They’ll Steal Your Life Savings and Social Life

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 29, 2025August 29, 2025

Alright, gamers, gather ’round for some *totally* unbiased truths about why you’re still wasting your lives in MMOs. šŸ™„ We’re…

“The Disinvited” Gets Rescued from the VHS Graveyard by Dark Star Pictures
Breaking, Music News

“The Disinvited” Gets Rescued from the VHS Graveyard by Dark Star Pictures

FinnAugust 22, 2025August 22, 2025

Dark Star Pictures, bless their cotton socks, has decided to unleash upon the world a cinematic masterpiece – or, you…

Nexstar Swallows Tegna Whole for a Measly $6.2 Billion: Local TV Doomed
Elephant Reads CNN

Nexstar Swallows Tegna Whole for a Measly $6.2 Billion: Local TV Doomed

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Oh, the Horror! More “Local News” Consolidation! As if we needed more leftist propaganda shoved down our throats. Nexstar, bless…

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Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President DJT claims vandalism caused Reflecting Pool damage
  • RuneScape dusts off player housing with fresh coat of monetization paint
  • Alex Skolnick Thinks Angus Young Is Good Or Something
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President DJT fixes Reflecting Pool after vandals cause 300 yard slashes
  • Floor Jansen Ditches Symphonic Stuff For Actual Metal Because You Begged Her To

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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