Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: DHS

Another Freakin’ Minnesota Shooting Just Turned the Immigration Debate Into a Total Dumpster Fire
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Another Freakin’ Minnesota Shooting Just Turned the Immigration Debate Into a Total Dumpster Fire

Big ElephantJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

What you’re seeing and what you’re reading is not what’s happening: The Deep State and Fake News Media are once…

Where Government Funding Talks Stand After The Minneapolis Shooting (A Totally Normal Week For A Totally Normal Government That Definitely Has Its Priorities Straight)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Where Government Funding Talks Stand After The Minneapolis Shooting (A Totally Normal Week For A Totally Normal Government That Definitely Has Its Priorities Straight)

Big ElephantJanuary 25, 2026January 25, 2026

Schumer and his band of leftist marionettes are holding the entire government hostage again, folks, all to protect their precious,…

Trump’s Wall Gets a New Job as His Coalition Cracks Wide Open
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Wall Gets a New Job as His Coalition Cracks Wide Open

Big ElephantJanuary 25, 2026January 25, 2026

TRUMP ADMINISTRATION STANDS FIRM AS LIBERAL MINNESOTA MELTS DOWN OVER BORDER ENFORCEMENT The Trump Administration is doubling down on its…

Federal Officers Accidentally Discover Gravity, Kinetic Energy in Minneapolis After Bullet Meets Body
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Federal Officers Accidentally Discover Gravity, Kinetic Energy in Minneapolis After Bullet Meets Body

Big ElephantJanuary 25, 2026January 25, 2026

Once again, a so-called “law-abiding citizen” in a liberal-run city has forced brave Border Patrol agents to defend themselves. Under…

Toddler Gets Frequent Flyer Miles in ICE’s Version of a Field Trip After Mistakenly Being Taken from Minnesota to Texas and Back Before Bedtime
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Toddler Gets Frequent Flyer Miles in ICE’s Version of a Field Trip After Mistakenly Being Taken from Minnesota to Texas and Back Before Bedtime

Big ElephantJanuary 24, 2026January 24, 2026

EXCLUSIVE: Deep State Judges and Radical Left Protesters in Minnesota Thwart President Trump’s Heroic ICE Agents During Routine Operation! Patriots,…

Analysis: The US government’s hilariously obvious “pretty please stop” message to white nationalists
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Analysis: The US government’s hilariously obvious “pretty please stop” message to white nationalists

Big ElephantJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

Liberal Media Meltdown: Trump’s DHS Recruits Patriots, CNN Panics Over ‘Home’ Sweet Home Oh, the humanity! CNN is having a…

ICE Officer Who Shot Woman in Minneapolis Previously Dragged by Suspect in Traffic Stop—Still Collecting a Badge
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

ICE Officer Who Shot Woman in Minneapolis Previously Dragged by Suspect in Traffic Stop—Still Collecting a Badge

Big ElephantJanuary 8, 2026January 8, 2026

Just When You Thought ICE Wasn’t Tough Enough, an Agent Gets Dragged By a Car—Then Shoots a Lady for Not…

DHS: Woman Tried to Turn ICE Officers Into Roadkill in Minneapolis, Then Things Got Bullet-y
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

DHS: Woman Tried to Turn ICE Officers Into Roadkill in Minneapolis, Then Things Got Bullet-y

Big ElephantJanuary 7, 2026January 7, 2026

President Trump, the undisputed king of truth and justice, has once again proven why he’s the only one who can…

FEMA’s New Budget Workout Plan: Layoffs Edition – Who Needs Disaster Relief When You Can Be the Disaster?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

FEMA’s New Budget Workout Plan: Layoffs Edition – Who Needs Disaster Relief When You Can Be the Disaster?

Big ElephantJanuary 6, 2026January 6, 2026

Another Day, Another Democrat Disaster: FEMA Staff Told to Pack Their Desks as Biden’s Failed Policies Collapse In a stunning…

DHS Let These Immigrants Slip Through Their Fingers—Watch the Trump Deportation Machine Throw a Tantrum
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

DHS Let These Immigrants Slip Through Their Fingers—Watch the Trump Deportation Machine Throw a Tantrum

Big ElephantDecember 26, 2025December 26, 2025

Chicago’s “Operation Midway Blitz”: When the Deep State Comes for Your Tacos and Gas Station Runs In a stunning turn…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 2 3 4 … 7 Next

Latest posts

  • Hatebreed in Houston, TX (07/10/2026)
  • The Last Ten Seconds Of Life in Houston, TX (07/10/2026)
  • Snuffed On Sight in Houston, TX (07/10/2026)
  • Breaking News Hilary Duff’s Life Has Been Completely Consumed by Mahjong and Honestly Who Needs Personal Growth or Human Interaction When You Have Tiles
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: Donald Trump posts on Truth Social on July 11 2026

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}