Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: DLC

The New York Game Awards 2026 Winners Have Been Revealed: Silicon Alley’s Finest Pretend We Care About Their Opinions!
Breaking, Games News

The New York Game Awards 2026 Winners Have Been Revealed: Silicon Alley’s Finest Pretend We Care About Their Opinions!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 19, 2026January 19, 2026

Hold onto your controllers and prepare your most smug takes, because the NYVGCC just finished their 15th annual ceremony where…

Dumb Drivers Treat Michigan Snow Like Mario Kart Rainbow Road, Create 100-Car DLC Crash
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Dumb Drivers Treat Michigan Snow Like Mario Kart Rainbow Road, Create 100-Car DLC Crash

Big ElephantJanuary 19, 2026January 19, 2026

LIBERAL WEATHER MACHINE FAILS AGAIN: Massive Michigan Pileup Proves Global Warming is a Hoax! In another spectacular failure of liberal…

The Sims 4 Officially Announces The “Pay 40 Dollars to Bow Down to a Digital Duke” Update
Breaking, Games News

The Sims 4 Officially Announces The “Pay 40 Dollars to Bow Down to a Digital Duke” Update

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 16, 2026January 16, 2026

Throw away your microwave dinners and peasant-grade furniture, because The Sims 4 has finally decided that your Sims are too…

Hi-Fi Rush physical release lets you pre-order the game you were told you couldn’t own
Breaking, Games News

Hi-Fi Rush physical release lets you pre-order the game you were told you couldn’t own

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 16, 2026January 16, 2026

🚨Attention all rhythm game enthusiasts and collectors who still own DVD players in the year of our Lord 2026! 🚨…

‘God of War’ TV Series Finally Finds Someone Angry Enough to Play Kratos (It’s Some Dude From ‘The Santa Clarita Diet’)
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

‘God of War’ TV Series Finally Finds Someone Angry Enough to Play Kratos (It’s Some Dude From ‘The Santa Clarita Diet’)

FinnJanuary 14, 2026January 14, 2026

🚨 BREAKING NEWS: It only took them the entire Age of the Ancients, a few cycles of Ragnarok, and probably…

Resident Evil Showcase About to Reveal New Requiem Gameplay And Here’s How To Watch Before You Get Spoiled
Breaking, Games News, Live

Resident Evil Showcase About to Reveal New Requiem Gameplay And Here’s How To Watch Before You Get Spoiled

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 13, 2026January 13, 2026

🎮 Get ready to sell your soul to the Umbrella Corporation again, because Resident Evil Requiem is dragging its rotting…

Nintendo Switch 2: Our 2026 Wishlist of Hopes, Dreams, and Mildly Unreasonable Demands
Breaking, Games News

Nintendo Switch 2: Our 2026 Wishlist of Hopes, Dreams, and Mildly Unreasonable Demands

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 11, 2026January 11, 2026

Behold, the Nintendo Switch 2 has been alive for a whole six months — a milestone so grand, we’re practically…

Code Vein II Producer Keita Iizuka Explains How Time Travel Factors In
Breaking, Games News

Code Vein II Producer Keita Iizuka Explains How Time Travel Factors In

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

Oh great, another cash grab disguised as “innovation” in gaming. Buckle up, you degenerates, because Bandai Namco just dropped the…

Report: The Witcher 3 Might Get A New DLC In May 2026—Because CD Projekt Really Missed Us Paying For More Than 10 Years
Breaking

Report: The Witcher 3 Might Get A New DLC In May 2026—Because CD Projekt Really Missed Us Paying For More Than 10 Years

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 5, 2026January 5, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: The Witcher 3 is Rising from the Grave Like a Reanimated Kikimora in May 2026 🧟‍♂️⚔️📅 Yes, you…

How to Monetize Your Players’ Existential Dread: A Guide to the 20-Hour Grind
Breaking, Games News

How to Monetize Your Players’ Existential Dread: A Guide to the 20-Hour Grind

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 23, 2025December 23, 2025

Attention, gamers! The industry is collapsing under the unbearable weight of its own epicness! 🚨 In a stunning turn of…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 5 6 7 … 10 Next

Latest posts

  • Spin of the Day: Vouchers Promise Students With Disabilities a Path to Private School. Parents Say That’s Not the Reality. — 8% Mostly Reality
  • Justice finally catches up with someone in Mississippi presumably
  • Bond Franchise Still Chugging Along Because Money
  • Because What The World Really Needed Was More Point Break
  • House Dems Freak Out Over AI, Want Recess Canceled Pronto

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.