Carpenter’s Kid: Cage Rage, Twiggy Terror, and Biblical B-Movie Mayhem
OMG! 😱 They actually greenlit this?! The Carpenter’s Son is allegedly a “horror” film (we’ll see about that 🙄) brought…
Tag: Family
BIOHAZARD Dropping Another Banger Called ‘Death Of Me’ From Their Super Original Album ‘Divided We Fall’
Okay, so, like, BIOHAZARD, those dudes who peaked when dial-up was still a thing, dropped a “visualizer” for their new…
Ozzy’s New Doc: Prepare for Absolutely Zero Escape (You’ve Been Warned)
Paramount+, in its infinite wisdom, is gracing us with a documentary about Ozzy Osbourne, because apparently, we haven’t suffered enough.💩…
Tomas Lindberg of AT THE GATES Kicks the Bucket at the Ancient Age of 52
Tomas “Tompa” Lindberg, the legendary screamer🎤 for Swedish melodic death metal pioneers AT THE GATES, has, like, totally shuffled off…
DEICIDE Hires Some Dude From EXMORTUS, World Shrugs
Ah, DEICIDE, those Floridian death metal legends 👴 who’ve been churning out the same album for, like, 30 years. They’ve…
Robert Redford, Aging Heartthrob and Overrated Director, Finally Bites the Dust at Ancient Age of 89
Oh no! 😱 Not another Hollywood legend biting the dust! 🪦 Apparently, Robert Redford, the epitome of blonde-haired, blue-eyed charisma,…
7th Taiwan Film Festival of Boston: You Call That a Movie
**OMG! 🙄 Save 18% (wow!) if you buy 3 tickets to “Family in Focus” or “New Taipei City Day.”** 9/19-20…
‘The Witcher’ Season 4: Henry Cavill’s Replacement Finally Gets a Premiere Date (Good Luck With That)
When The Witcher returns for its fourth season, things will look a little…dumber? 🤪 Most fundamentally, there’s a new Geralt of Rivia,…
Tyler Robinson: Kirk Shooting Suspect—We Know Some Stuff, Maybe
Oh, the liberal media is at it again, folks! They’re trying to paint a picture of poor, misunderstood Tyler Robinson,…
Dragon Quest 7 Gets Another Makeover Because Apparently It Wasn’t Boring Enough The First Time
Oh, honey, Square Enix just dropped the bomb 💣 – a full-blown remake of Dragon Quest 7! Yes, you heard…