Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Festival

Tom Keifer’s Voice Finally Gets a Break from His Own Songs
Breaking, Music News

Tom Keifer’s Voice Finally Gets a Break from His Own Songs

Chord F. DiscordAugust 27, 2026August 27, 2026

Oh no, the sky is falling! Tom Keifer, the legendary frontman of Cinderella, has lost his singing voice due to…

Dave Mustaine singlehandedly saved metal guitarists from eternal shame
Breaking, Music News

Dave Mustaine singlehandedly saved metal guitarists from eternal shame

Chord F. DiscordAugust 24, 2026August 24, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some nostalgic metal goodness? 🤘 Because Dave Mustaine just spilled his guts about…

DIMMU BORGIR Still Exists Because They Clearly Hate Their Families
Breaking, Music News

DIMMU BORGIR Still Exists Because They Clearly Hate Their Families

Chord F. DiscordAugust 23, 2026August 23, 2026

Oh boy, you guys, I’ve got some earth-shattering news that will probably change the course of your life forever: Dimmu…

EIFF 2026 Review: Because Who Needs a Plot When You Can Just Watch a Stationary Arrow for 2 Hours Straight
Breaking, Movie News

EIFF 2026 Review: Because Who Needs a Plot When You Can Just Watch a Stationary Arrow for 2 Hours Straight

FinnAugust 20, 2026August 20, 2026

The 79th Edinburgh International Film Festival has kicked off, and I’m thrilled to report that it’s been a wild ride…

Ozzfest 2027 somehow still happening with one day of tolerable music
Breaking, Music News

Ozzfest 2027 somehow still happening with one day of tolerable music

Chord F. DiscordAugust 19, 2026August 19, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Jack Osbourne, the son of the Prince of Darkness himself, Ozzy Osbourne, has confirmed…

Floor Jansen Butchers Metallica Classic With Bunch Of Sailors
Breaking, Music News

Floor Jansen Butchers Metallica Classic With Bunch Of Sailors

Chord F. DiscordAugust 19, 2026August 19, 2026

Oh boy, are you in for a treat! 🎉 NIGHTWISH singer Floor Jansen just performed with the Marine Band Of…

Overhyped Movies Overpriced Popcorn and a Whole Lot of Pretentious Film Critics at TIFF 2026
Breaking, Movie News

Overhyped Movies Overpriced Popcorn and a Whole Lot of Pretentious Film Critics at TIFF 2026

FinnAugust 18, 2026August 18, 2026

And, honestly, who isn’t excited? I mean, it’s not like we have anything better to do than watch a bunch…

Anneke Van Giersbergen Still Milking 30 Year Old Album Because You People Won’t Let It Die
Breaking, Music News

Anneke Van Giersbergen Still Milking 30 Year Old Album Because You People Won’t Let It Die

Chord F. DiscordAugust 17, 2026August 17, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some nostalgia?! 🙄 Anneke Van Giersbergen, the legendary vocalist of THE GATHERING, is…

Wednesday 13 teams up with John 5 because his solo career was going so well
Breaking, Music News

Wednesday 13 teams up with John 5 because his solo career was going so well

Chord F. DiscordAugust 16, 2026August 16, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤯 I just got word that Wednesday 13 is teaming…

Abbath Throws Epic Tantrum Cuts Show After 2 Whole Minutes Of Tolerating Humans
Breaking, Music News

Abbath Throws Epic Tantrum Cuts Show After 2 Whole Minutes Of Tolerating Humans

Chord F. DiscordAugust 15, 2026August 16, 2026

Oh no, the apocalypse has finally arrived: Abbath’s concert lasted a whole 2 minutes 🤯! I mean, who needs a…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 5 6 7 … 19 Next

Latest posts

  • LEGALIZER: Sock‑Sandwich Gets the Federal Grandstand
  • Family Shooting Survival Streak Continues Uninterrupted For Generations Apparently
  • GOP Spends Big on Crime Ads Without Victims’ Consent Apparently
  • War Remains Trump’s Playground Regardless Of Midterm Outcome
  • Federal Judge To Trump Admin: Stop Guessing Who’s Not American

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.