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Tag: Florida

Alter Bridge’s “Silent Divide” Video: Prepare to Be Mildly Diverted from Your Daily Grind
Breaking, Music News

Alter Bridge’s “Silent Divide” Video: Prepare to Be Mildly Diverted from Your Daily Grind

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 3, 2025September 3, 2025

Oh joy, oh rapture! 🥳 Those purveyors of generic rock anthems, 🎸ALTER BRIDGE🎸, are back with a new album and…

OMG! Basic People Obsessed with Knock-Off Labubu Dolls—Can Pop Mart Handle the Hype?
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Basic People Obsessed with Knock-Off Labubu Dolls—Can Pop Mart Handle the Hype?

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

More proof the Chinese are trying to brainwash our children with creepy dolls! This “Labubu” nonsense is just another attempt…

Trucker, probably an alien, denied bail, Trump probably high-fives
Elephant Reads CNN

Trucker, probably an alien, denied bail, Trump probably high-fives

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

Another day, another tragedy made possible by the radical Left’s open border policies! A truck driver from India, Harjinder Singh,…

JAGER HENRY, Grandson of the LEGENDARY John Bonham, Forms Band That’s TOTALLY Gonna Live Up to the Name
Breaking, Music News

JAGER HENRY, Grandson of the LEGENDARY John Bonham, Forms Band That’s TOTALLY Gonna Live Up to the Name

Chord F. DiscordAugust 23, 2025August 23, 2025

So, apparently, there’s this guy, Jager Henry, grandson of the legendary John Bonham and son of Jason Bonham. Like we…

SLASH FEATURING WHO CARES & THE WHATNOWS’ New Album To Be Released When Pigs Fly
Breaking, Music News

SLASH FEATURING WHO CARES & THE WHATNOWS’ New Album To Be Released When Pigs Fly

Chord F. DiscordAugust 22, 2025August 22, 2025

SLASH FEATURING MYLES KENNEDY & THE CONSPIRATORS, AKA the band that nobody asked for, is generously bestowing upon us their…

Alligator Alcatraz: No Newbies Allowed (Says the Judge)
Elephant Reads CNN

Alligator Alcatraz: No Newbies Allowed (Says the Judge)

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2025August 22, 2025

Another day, another victory for the radical environmentalists and virtue-signaling Native American tribes! A federal judge, probably appointed by some…

TRIVIUM’s Next Album: Prepare to Be Mildly Excited in 2026/2027 (Maybe)
Breaking, Music News

TRIVIUM’s Next Album: Prepare to Be Mildly Excited in 2026/2027 (Maybe)

Chord F. DiscordAugust 21, 2025August 21, 2025

Oh, the DRAMA! 🙄 In a groundbreaking, earth-shattering interview with Bloodstock TV host Oran “Who?” O’Beirne, Paolo “The Bassist” Gregoletto…

Bodysnatcher in Charlotte, NC (08/17/2025)
Videos

Bodysnatcher in Charlotte, NC (08/17/2025)

Chuck B. BallsyAugust 17, 2025

American deathcore band from Florida Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

Boys Head to Jupiter, Leaving IQs Behind
Events

Boys Head to Jupiter, Leaving IQs Behind

Chuck B. BallsyAugust 15, 2025

**OMG! 🙄 Billy 5000 (Jack Corbett) in Florida post-Xmas is hustling on Grubster to make $5,000 by New Year’s Eve!**…

ANTHRAX: Still Alive? Book Your Geriatric Metal Cruise Cabin Now!
Breaking, Events, Music News

ANTHRAX: Still Alive? Book Your Geriatric Metal Cruise Cabin Now!

Chord F. DiscordAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Ahoy, shipmates! Get ready to drain your bank accounts 💸 because 70000 Tons Of Metal, the only metal cruise that…

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Latest posts

  • ARCHITECTS Singer SAM CARTER Reveals The Most Metal Thing That’s Ever Happened To Him: METALLICA’s JAMES HETFIELD Brought Them A Cake And Didn’t Even Smash It
  • SBC Approves Use Of Tasers On Any Visitor Who Tries To Slip Past Greeters
  • When your parents ask what kind of music you listen to
  • Enhanced Games Allows Competing Athletes To Use Steroids
  • Woman Worried She In Codependent Relationship With Rest Of Humanity 

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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