Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Girls

Another farewell to Donna Summer’s catalog, again, somehow, still
Breaking, Music News

Another farewell to Donna Summer’s catalog, again, somehow, still

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 2, 2026September 2, 2026

The music industry’s perpetual motion machine has churned out yet another deluxe edition, because apparently retirement is just a suggestion.…

BABYMETAL saves world from actual zombies with new Marvel cover
Breaking, Music News

BABYMETAL saves world from actual zombies with new Marvel cover

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 2, 2026September 2, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for the most epic collaboration of the century? 🤯 I mean, who wouldn’t want…

Dad Finally Gets Closure After Only 30 Years Of Waiting
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Dad Finally Gets Closure After Only 30 Years Of Waiting

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the Texas Killing Fields case, and I have to say, it’s a wild…

Texas Killing Fields Suspect Finally Faces Music Decades Later Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Killing Fields Suspect Finally Faces Music Decades Later Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 30, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the Texas Killing Fields, a case that’s been open for decades. Folks, this…

Milo Yiannopoulos’ Excellent Adventure Ends In Deportation Threat
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Milo Yiannopoulos’ Excellent Adventure Ends In Deportation Threat

Big ElephantAugust 29, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. British provocateur Milo Yiannopoulos, the guy who built his career on…

Because What The World Needed Was A Hooters Movie To Complete Humanity
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Needed Was A Hooters Movie To Complete Humanity

FinnAugust 28, 2026August 29, 2026

Because the world was just missing a cinematic retelling of the founding of a breastaurant chain, the founding partners of…

Trump Begs Supreme Court To Keep Trans People Out Of Military
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Begs Supreme Court To Keep Trans People Out Of Military

Big ElephantAugust 28, 2026

The Trump administration is at it again, folks, and this time they’re taking their transgender military ban to the Supreme…

Because What The World Really Needed Was More 30 Rock
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Really Needed Was More 30 Rock

FinnAugust 26, 2026August 26, 2026

30 Rock is back, but only if you’re in New York and willing to fight for tickets. Because that’s exactly…

Queens Of The Stone Age still making music somehow
Breaking, Music News

Queens Of The Stone Age still making music somehow

Chord F. DiscordAugust 25, 2026August 25, 2026

Oh boy, it’s finally happening! Queens of the Stone Age are back with their ninth album, “Perfecth”, and we can’t…

Log Cabin Republicans Ditch Trans Friends, Still Super Conservative Though
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Log Cabin Republicans Ditch Trans Friends, Still Super Conservative Though

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Log Cabin Republicans, a group for gay conservatives, has decided…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 2 3 … 10 Next

Latest posts

  • NY Gov Hochul Addresses Cornell Rape Allegations With Straight Face
  • Robbie Williams Returns to Argentina After Decades Away
  • Christa Pike Still Alive Somehow
  • Noah Kahan Drops New Song for Hunger Games Prequel
  • Drake Drops Four Fresh Tracks Including Choosin Texas Remix

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.