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OpenAI Discovers China’s Secret Weapon: A Single Guy and His ChatGPT Addiction
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

OpenAI Discovers China’s Secret Weapon: A Single Guy and His ChatGPT Addiction

Big ElephantFebruary 25, 2026February 25, 2026

Big Tech Finally Exposes China’s Sneaky Disinformation Playbook—Thanks to ChatGPT’s Accidental Whistleblower In what can only be described as a…

Anthropic Abandons Safety Pledge Mid-Fight, Proving Even AI Ethicists Can’t Resist the Pentagon’s Siren Song
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Anthropic Abandons Safety Pledge Mid-Fight, Proving Even AI Ethicists Can’t Resist the Pentagon’s Siren Song

Big ElephantFebruary 25, 2026February 25, 2026

Deep State Puppets at Anthropic Bow to Pentagon Overlords, Ditch ‘Safety’ Charade In a shocking turn of events that proves…

Backrooms Trailer: Kane Parsons and A24 Deliver the Ultimate Existential Crisis in a Sci-Fi Horror You’ll Regret Watching
Breaking, Movie News

Backrooms Trailer: Kane Parsons and A24 Deliver the Ultimate Existential Crisis in a Sci-Fi Horror You’ll Regret Watching

FinnFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

Prepare your nerves for the most existential crisis since realizing your IKEA furniture will never be as stable as the…

BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME Announces May/June 2026 U.S. Tour – Because Waiting for Prog Metal is Just Part of the Experience
OH LOOK, IT'S THAT BAND THAT MAKES MUSIC SO COMPLICATED EVEN THEIR MOMS NEED A FLOWCHART TO FOLLOW ALONG
Breaking, Live, Music News

BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME Announces May/June 2026 U.S. Tour – Because Waiting for Prog Metal is Just Part of the Experience

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

In a move that shocked absolutely no one, BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME—those math wizards of prog metal who apparently…

Live

2026 Virtual Photo Beach Bash: Where Sand Is Optional and Your WiFi Is the Only Wave

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 23, 2026

Attention Photography Enthusiasts! Prepare for the Zoom-iest Event of the Year! 📸✨ The Coastal Camera Club proudly presents their 6th…

Live

Honeymoon Avenue: A Staged Reading or Just a Rehearsal for Divorce?

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 22, 2026

✨ YOU’RE INVITED TO A SPECIAL STAGED READING EVENT ✨ Honeymoon AvenueA Play by LaDarrion Williams 📺 💘 🎭 Step…

Live

“John McDevitt’s Life Saved by Benefit Concert: Because Clearly, He Can’t Save Himself”

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 22, 2026

Benefit for John McDevitt: Because Brain Surgery Costs More Than a Netflix Subscription Hey everyone! John’s brain is on sale…

2026 Conference: Where Celebs, CEOs, and Jocks Pretend to Care About Each Other
Live

2026 Conference: Where Celebs, CEOs, and Jocks Pretend to Care About Each Other

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 22, 2026

Eventbrite’s footer is like a Choose Your Own Adventure book, but instead of escaping a dungeon, you’re navigating ticket sales.…

Live

“2026 Women in AI Symposium & Virtual Networking Canada: Because Robots Need Girl Power Too!”

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 21, 2026

The 2026 WaiSymposium and Virtual Networking by Women in Canada is here to save you from becoming obsolete in the…

Zelda Games Ranked: From ‘Wait, This Exists?’ to ‘Breath of the Wild-ly Overrated’
Breaking, Games News

Zelda Games Ranked: From ‘Wait, This Exists?’ to ‘Breath of the Wild-ly Overrated’

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 21, 2026February 21, 2026

On December 4th, 2025, CGM’s Dayna Eileen messaged me, completely unprompted: “You should rank the Zelda games.” Being on the…

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Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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