Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Him

Trump Somehow Manages Not To Veto Russia Sanctions This Time
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Somehow Manages Not To Veto Russia Sanctions This Time

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one – it seems President Donald Trump is going to support a…

Bison wins brawl with grandfather at Yellowstone somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Bison wins brawl with grandfather at Yellowstone somehow

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

So, I’m sitting here sipping my coffee and reading about a guy who got tossed into the air by a…

Capitol Police Bust Guy Who Clearly Didn’t Get the Memo
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Capitol Police Bust Guy Who Clearly Didn’t Get the Memo

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I was sipping my coffee and scrolling through CNN when I came across this story about a guy getting…

Legendary actor Sam Neill falls prey to mortality’s gameplay mechanic
Breaking, Movie News

Legendary actor Sam Neill falls prey to mortality’s gameplay mechanic

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 13, 2026

Today, the gaming world lost a legend, and I’m not talking about the latest overhyped, live-service game that’s about to…

BILL WARD still whining about Ozzy 40 years later apparently everyone needed this update
Breaking, Music News

BILL WARD still whining about Ozzy 40 years later apparently everyone needed this update

Chord F. DiscordJuly 13, 2026

Oh boy, grab your tissues and get ready for a feels trip, because Bill Ward is talking about his dearly…

Vets Face Firing Squad in Tone-Deaf Cartoon Chaos
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Vets Face Firing Squad in Tone-Deaf Cartoon Chaos

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about a cartoon that’s got some congressman’s undies in a twist. Apparently, a…

Fresh Faces Head to Congress to Explain All the Chaos They Made
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fresh Faces Head to Congress to Explain All the Chaos They Made

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Supreme Court is asking Congress for a big chunk of…

Graham and Trump Bizarrely Become Best Buds Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Graham and Trump Bizarrely Become Best Buds Somehow

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems that Senator Lindsey Graham, who once told Donald Trump…

Frank Ferrer Leaves Guns N Roses Because Even He Got Bored
Breaking, Music News

Frank Ferrer Leaves Guns N Roses Because Even He Got Bored

Chord F. DiscordJuly 13, 2026

I just spilled my beer all over my “Appetite for Destruction” vinyl because I’m still trying to process the earth-shattering…

Graham’s Departure Sparks Thrilling Game of Musical Chairs in Washington
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Graham’s Departure Sparks Thrilling Game of Musical Chairs in Washington

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

The death of Sen. Lindsey Graham and the long hospitalization of Sen. Mitch McConnell are reminders that time waits for…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 58 59 60 … 162 Next

Latest posts

  • Starbucks Shrinks Stores Because Who Needs Personal Space Anyway
  • Democrats Gather To Argue Over Who Loses To Republicans Next
  • GOP Voters Fleeing To Democrats In Droves Apparently
  • Jim Bakker’s wild ride finally ends at 86
  • Trump Successfully Angers Iran Some More

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.