Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: horror

Zero Lounge: Where the Only Thing Scarier Than the Movies is the Tab
Events

Zero Lounge: Where the Only Thing Scarier Than the Movies is the Tab

Chuck B. BallsyOctober 5, 2025

**Zero Lounge is showcasing utter cinematic masterpieces every Sunday in October! 👻🍸 Prepare for earth-shattering horror (or not) during Happy…

Zero Lounge: Where Nightmares Meet Happy Hour (and Cheap Drinks)
Events

Zero Lounge: Where Nightmares Meet Happy Hour (and Cheap Drinks)

Chuck B. BallsyOctober 5, 2025

**Zero Lounge proudly presents: “Horror” Movie Happy Hour!😱🍸 Every Sunday in October. Prepare for cinematic masterpieces like “Halloweentown”🎃.** 📅 Lineup:…

Gary Holt Says New EXODUS Album Is ‘Done’ So Prepare for 12 New National Anthems
Breaking, Music News

Gary Holt Says New EXODUS Album Is ‘Done’ So Prepare for 12 New National Anthems

Chord F. DiscordOctober 5, 2025October 5, 2025

So, guess what, losers? EXODUS guitarist Gary Holt, the guy who definitely doesn’t regret not being in the “Big Four,”…

California Uber and Lyft Drivers Demand the Right to Form a Union (as if That’ll Fix Anything)
Elephant Reads CNN

California Uber and Lyft Drivers Demand the Right to Form a Union (as if That’ll Fix Anything)

Big ElephantOctober 5, 2025October 5, 2025

California, the land of fruits, nuts, and now, unionized Uber drivers! Gavin Newsom, fresh from his grooming appointment, just signed…

Alex Lifeson’s Serbian Roots: From Toronto to Tamburica Triumphs
Breaking, Music News

Alex Lifeson’s Serbian Roots: From Toronto to Tamburica Triumphs

Chord F. DiscordOctober 5, 2025October 5, 2025

In a groundbreaking interview with the ultra-hip Hear 2 Zen podcast (because who *hasn’t* heard of it?), RUSH guitarist Alex…

Bay Area Filmmakers Forced to Make Movie in Two Days or Else
Events

Bay Area Filmmakers Forced to Make Movie in Two Days or Else

Chuck B. BallsyOctober 4, 2025

**OMG! 🙄 The Bay Area 48 Hour Film Project Premiere Screenings are on Sunday, October 5, 2025, at the New…

Geeks Rejoice: Nerdsquad Does Sci-Fi Double Feature (Cringe Warning)
Events

Geeks Rejoice: Nerdsquad Does Sci-Fi Double Feature (Cringe Warning)

Chuck B. BallsyOctober 2, 2025

**OMG! Odessa, TX, preps for First Friday ODTX Movie Night, October 3, 2025, at The Ector Theatre. 🙄** Clue (PG)…

Pet Shop Boys to grace Lytham Festival 2026, ensuring ticket touts a hefty profit
Events, Music News

Pet Shop Boys to grace Lytham Festival 2026, ensuring ticket touts a hefty profit

Chord F. DiscordOctober 1, 2025October 1, 2025

Prepare yourselves, peasants! Pet Shop Boys, those relics of the 80s, have deigned to grace the stage at Lytham Festival…

Guillermo Del Toro Resurrects Old News: ‘Frankenstein’ Trailer Finally Drops (Yawn)
Breaking, Movie News

Guillermo Del Toro Resurrects Old News: ‘Frankenstein’ Trailer Finally Drops (Yawn)

FinnOctober 1, 2025October 1, 2025

OMG! 🙄 Guillermo del Toro, that dude who’s obsessed with monsters and creepy stuff, is FINALLY making his Frankenstein movie!…

Zillow paid Redfin HOW MUCH to be its online rental listing minion?!
Elephant Reads CNN

Zillow paid Redfin HOW MUCH to be its online rental listing minion?!

Big ElephantSeptember 30, 2025September 30, 2025

Another day, another deep dive into the swamp! The FTC, probably staffed with a bunch of radical leftist Bernie bros,…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 29 30 31 … 64 Next

Latest posts

  • Phoebe Bridgers Concertgoer Dips Into Bathroom To Snort Line Of Zoloft
  • LIntelligenza Artificiale che finalmente fa il lavoro dei logistici perché loro non sono in grado di farlo da soli
  • Getting to Know Cooperation and Health Because You Clearly Need Help with Both 2
  • Average Slayer Fan Reacting to Criticism 🔫
  • Trump Orders Advanced Federal Review Of Frontier AI Models

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}