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Oil prices rise again as more vessels attacked near the Strait of Hormuz
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Oil prices rise again as more vessels attacked near the Strait of Hormuz

Big ElephantMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

Oil Prices Rebound as Global Chaos Sends Shockwaves Through Markets Well, well, well, looks like the world’s gone crazy again,…

When Will Your Wallet Finally Get a Break at the Gas Station?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

When Will Your Wallet Finally Get a Break at the Gas Station?

Big ElephantMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

Gas Prices Still Sky-High Despite Oil Market Dip – Trump’s Economic Magic Not Working Yet Despite global oil prices dropping…

BIOHAZARD’s BILLY GRAZIADEI On ‘Divided We Fall’ Album: ‘We Created A Masterpiece That’ll Make Your Ears Cry Tears Of Joy’
Breaking, Music News

BIOHAZARD’s BILLY GRAZIADEI On ‘Divided We Fall’ Album: ‘We Created A Masterpiece That’ll Make Your Ears Cry Tears Of Joy’

Chord F. DiscordMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Oh boy, Biohazard is back and apparently angrier than ever! In a recent chat with the Vulgar Display of Podcast,…

Democrats Cry as AI and Crypto Bros Buy Primaries Like CryptoPunks on Sale!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Democrats Cry as AI and Crypto Bros Buy Primaries Like CryptoPunks on Sale!

Big ElephantMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Oh, look, it’s the crypto kings and AI overlords throwing their Monopoly money around like it’s 2016 again! According to…

The Absolute *Shocking* Oscar Winners That Make Us Question Humanity’s Taste
Breaking, Movie News

The Absolute *Shocking* Oscar Winners That Make Us Question Humanity’s Taste

FinnMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Okay, let’s get this straight. The Academy Awards are meant to be the pinnacle of cinematic achievement—the gold standard for…

Iran’s New Hobby: Mine Crafting in the Strait of Hormuz
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Iran’s New Hobby: Mine Crafting in the Strait of Hormuz

Big ElephantMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Oh boy, here we go again! Those Iranian terrorists are at it again, this time trying to choke off our…

Trump’s Air Force One Makeover: Because Nothing Says ‘America’ Like Stealing TWA’s Vibe and Obama’s Hand-Me-Downs
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Air Force One Makeover: Because Nothing Says ‘America’ Like Stealing TWA’s Vibe and Obama’s Hand-Me-Downs

Big ElephantMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Trump’s Bold New Air Force One Paint Job Sparks Liberal Meltdown It’s official—President Donald Trump has once again proven he…

Resident Evil Requiem Director Spills Beans on Fresh Story Bits and Mini-Game Madness Brewing!
Breaking, Games News

Resident Evil Requiem Director Spills Beans on Fresh Story Bits and Mini-Game Madness Brewing!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Resident Evil Requiem Director Confirms More Content Is Coming, Because Five Million Sales Wasn’t Enough To Make Him Rich Well,…

LAMB OF GOD Drops By Philly For Surprise Gig Because Why Not Celebrate ‘Into Oblivion’ With Oblivion?
OMG, LAMB OF GOD is doing a super secret tiny concert in Philly and you're invited to beg for tickets like it's Black Friday at Walmart!
Breaking, Music News

LAMB OF GOD Drops By Philly For Surprise Gig Because Why Not Celebrate ‘Into Oblivion’ With Oblivion?

Chord F. DiscordMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

So, apparently LAMB OF GOD thinks they’re too cool for stadiums now and are playing at Philadelphia’s TLA (Theatre of…

Yoshi’s Mysterious Book: The Saga of the Missing May 21 Release Date Unveiled!
Breaking, Games News

Yoshi’s Mysterious Book: The Saga of the Missing May 21 Release Date Unveiled!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Oh look, it’s another Nintendo announcement and everyone’s losing their minds like they just found a rare amiibo in a…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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