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Tag: James

FAA Employees Try Not to Spill Their Pumpkin Spice Lattes as Shutdown Looms and Holiday Travel Turns into a ‘Hangry’ Games Episode
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

FAA Employees Try Not to Spill Their Pumpkin Spice Lattes as Shutdown Looms and Holiday Travel Turns into a ‘Hangry’ Games Episode

Big ElephantNovember 12, 2025November 12, 2025

Washington D.C. – Can you believe these Deep State FAA employees? Suddenly, they can’t handle their jobs because they missed…

‘Avatar: Fire and Ash’: Prepare to Have Your Eyeballs Glued to the Screen for an Eternity
Breaking, Movie News

‘Avatar: Fire and Ash’: Prepare to Have Your Eyeballs Glued to the Screen for an Eternity

FinnNovember 12, 2025November 12, 2025

Prepare yourselves for an epic cinematic experience filled with… more blue people doing stuff. πŸ™„ According to the esteemed AMC…

Judge Delays Epic vs Google Settlement: Demands Less Secrecy, More Shenanigans
Breaking, Games News

Judge Delays Epic vs Google Settlement: Demands Less Secrecy, More Shenanigans

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 12, 2025November 12, 2025

Okay, gamers, gather ’round because this is HUGE! 🀩 Remember that time Epic Games and Google went at it like…

RAVEN Does METALLICA’s ‘Metal Militia’ – Prepare for Pigeon Mayhem from ‘Tribute to Kill ‘Em All (Again?)’
Breaking, Music News

RAVEN Does METALLICA’s ‘Metal Militia’ – Prepare for Pigeon Mayhem from ‘Tribute to Kill ‘Em All (Again?)’

Chord F. DiscordNovember 12, 2025November 12, 2025

Silver Lining Music, apparently unaware of the sheer audacity of their actions, will be unleashing “No Life ‘Til Leather –…

Islands: Yet Another Trailer Starring People You’ve Barely Heard Of
Breaking, Movie News

Islands: Yet Another Trailer Starring People You’ve Barely Heard Of

FinnNovember 6, 2025November 6, 2025

Oh, look, another “twisty thriller” πŸ™„. This one’s about a tennis coach, because apparently, being a tennis coach at a…

Lucy Liu’s “Rosemead” Trailer: Prepare to Have Your Definition of “Career-Defining” Redefined (Again)
Breaking, Movie News

Lucy Liu’s “Rosemead” Trailer: Prepare to Have Your Definition of “Career-Defining” Redefined (Again)

FinnNovember 6, 2025November 6, 2025

Oh, look, another movie about a “troubled” family! πŸ™„ Seriously, Hollywood, are we STILL milking this cow? Lucy Liu, bless…

Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz: Back for More Bandages and Bad Decisions
Breaking, Movie News

Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz: Back for More Bandages and Bad Decisions

FinnNovember 4, 2025November 4, 2025

OMG 😱! Are you serious?! Another Mummy movie? Starring BRENDAN FRASER πŸ‘΄ and RACHEL WEISZ πŸ‘΅?! It’s like Universal Pictures…

Wildcat: Watch Kate Beckinsale try not to meow her way through this action-thriller trailer
Breaking, Movie News

Wildcat: Watch Kate Beckinsale try not to meow her way through this action-thriller trailer

FinnOctober 29, 2025October 29, 2025

Okay, so James Nunn (who apparently peaked with “One Shot” πŸ™„) is directing this cinematic masterpiece. And get this cast:…

A PERFECT CIRCLE Finally Bother to Grace Europe with Their Presence After All These Years
Events, Music News

A PERFECT CIRCLE Finally Bother to Grace Europe with Their Presence After All These Years

Chord F. DiscordOctober 27, 2025October 27, 2025

OMG! 😱 Guess who’s crawling out of their hidey-holes and gracing Europe with their presence? None other than A PERFECT…

The DAMNED to Release Covers Album Titled ‘Not Like Everybody Else’ (Because Paying Tribute to BRIAN JAMES is Totally Mainstream)
Breaking, Music News

The DAMNED to Release Covers Album Titled ‘Not Like Everybody Else’ (Because Paying Tribute to BRIAN JAMES is Totally Mainstream)

Chord F. DiscordOctober 27, 2025October 27, 2025

OMG! 😱THE DAMNED, those lovable geriatrics of punk, are BACK! And guess what? They’ve decided to grace us with “Not…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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