Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Madness

Gold and Silver Do the Hokey Pokey, Bitcoin Takes a Tumble as Markets Start February with a Shaky Cha-Cha
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Gold and Silver Do the Hokey Pokey, Bitcoin Takes a Tumble as Markets Start February with a Shaky Cha-Cha

Big ElephantFebruary 2, 2026February 2, 2026

Liberal Market Chaos: Gold, Bitcoin, and Stocks in Freefall! Well, well, well, folks! It looks like the loony liberals on…

Live

“Trinidad 2026: Sunrise Buffet for Night Owls Pretending Carnival Starts Before Brunch”

Chuck B. BallsyJanuary 27, 2026

SUNRISE BREAKFAST PARTY 2026: Because Trinidad’s Carnival needed pancakes & 5AM regrets 🥞🥴 🎉 Grab those “Super Early Bird” tickets…

The Definitive (And Only) Ranking of Sam Raimi’s Most Bonkers Creations Because Your Opinion is Wrong Forever
Breaking, Movie News

The Definitive (And Only) Ranking of Sam Raimi’s Most Bonkers Creations Because Your Opinion is Wrong Forever

FinnJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

Sam Raimi directs movies with the urgency of a sloth meditating 🐢. In the past 15 years, he’s blessed us…

Spare a Thought for the Minnesota State Senator Who Had to Witness the Unprecedented Horror of People Simply Feeling Fear After a Killing
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Spare a Thought for the Minnesota State Senator Who Had to Witness the Unprecedented Horror of People Simply Feeling Fear After a Killing

Big ElephantJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

Minneapolis Mayor Begs President Trump for Help as Liberal Policies Turn City into ‘Hellscape’ In a stunning admission of failure,…

MEGADETH Drops ‘Puppet Parade’ and Proves They Still Have Strings Attached to the 80s
Breaking, Music News

MEGADETH Drops ‘Puppet Parade’ and Proves They Still Have Strings Attached to the 80s

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 19, 2026January 19, 2026

🚨 BREAKING NEWS FROM THE THRASH GODS! 🚨 Dave Mustaine Has Officially Announced MEGADETH’s Final Album, and Yes, It Includes…

Rubio Admits US Government Has Absolutely No Clue Where 137 Venezuelans It Deported Ended Up After Invoking 18th Century Alien Enemies Act
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Rubio Admits US Government Has Absolutely No Clue Where 137 Venezuelans It Deported Ended Up After Invoking 18th Century Alien Enemies Act

Big ElephantJanuary 13, 2026January 13, 2026

**In a stunning display of Deep State obstruction, the globalist-funded courts and their CNN allies are now demanding that President…

ALEX SKOLNICK Teams Up With ARDESHIR FARAH: Where Shredding Meets Shiraz
Breaking, Music News

ALEX SKOLNICK Teams Up With ARDESHIR FARAH: Where Shredding Meets Shiraz

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 9, 2026January 9, 2026

When the Electric Guitar Met Its Long-Lost Acoustic Cousin: A Tale of Two Six-String Wizards, One Who Forgot What Plugs…

Monsters are Coming! Rock & Road Deserves Space in Your Steam Library
Breaking, Games News

Monsters are Coming! Rock & Road Deserves Space in Your Steam Library

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 4, 2026January 4, 2026

Move Over, Grandma—The Real Survivors Are Here! Monsters Are Coming! Rock & Road Is the Only Game That Lets You…

5 Things You Definitely Didn’t Forget on New Year’s Eve (Because You Were Too Busy Panic-Eating and Swiping Left) | CNN
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things You Definitely Didn’t Forget on New Year’s Eve (Because You Were Too Busy Panic-Eating and Swiping Left) | CNN

Big ElephantDecember 31, 2025December 31, 2025

Another Day of Liberal Lunacy and Globalist Shenanigans: 2025’s Last Gasps Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit—here…

CANNIBAL CORPSE’s ALEX WEBSTER Claims Death Metal Is Basically SLAYER’s Unhinged Lovechild
Breaking, Music News

CANNIBAL CORPSE’s ALEX WEBSTER Claims Death Metal Is Basically SLAYER’s Unhinged Lovechild

Chord F. DiscordDecember 31, 2025December 31, 2025

When Death Metal Was Just Dad’s Old Rock Records and a Dream 😈🎸 Back in the day, before streaming algorithms…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 4 5 6 … 10 Next

Latest posts

  • Erik Grönwall reunites 14 people with his new music video
  • Proud Boys Get Free Pass Courtesy of Justice System Again
  • Trump Tries To Delay Housing Bill But Oops It Passed Anyway
  • Trump’s Playbook Now Required Reading For Aspiring Demagogues Everywhere
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump threatens Iran with 1000 missiles and more

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}