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Tag: movie news

OMG! Taylor Swift Is Stalking Movie Theaters Near You! Hide Your Popcorn!
Events

OMG! Taylor Swift Is Stalking Movie Theaters Near You! Hide Your Popcorn!

FinnSeptember 19, 2025September 19, 2025

ARE YOU TRIGGERED, SWIFTIES? 🤡 Taylor Swift, the queen of calculated moves and manufactured drama, is allegedly waltzing back into…

“It’s Assault, Not an Appetizer!”: Anaconda Chokes on Jack Black, Sparks Lawsuit Against Columbia Pictures
Hollywood Scandal: Anaconda Refuses to Finish Jack Black, Calling Him "Toxic Fast Food"
Movie News

“It’s Assault, Not an Appetizer!”: Anaconda Chokes on Jack Black, Sparks Lawsuit Against Columbia Pictures

FinnSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

The film world has been rocked by a scandal that smells not just of multimillion-dollar lawsuits, but also of a…

Oh great, MORE Darkness!
Breaking, Movie News

Oh great, MORE Darkness!

FinnSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

Oh great, The Darkness is back 🙄. Yes, that iconic, long-running (and by “long-running” we mean “milked dry”) series is…

Carpenter’s Kid: Cage Rage, Twiggy Terror, and Biblical B-Movie Mayhem
Breaking, Movie News

Carpenter’s Kid: Cage Rage, Twiggy Terror, and Biblical B-Movie Mayhem

FinnSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

OMG! 😱 They actually greenlit this?! The Carpenter’s Son is allegedly a “horror” film (we’ll see about that 🙄) brought…

“Wuthering Heights” Gets Teaser Posters: Prepare for Peak Angsty Vibes, Courtesy of Barbie and That Guy From Euphoria
Breaking, Movie News

“Wuthering Heights” Gets Teaser Posters: Prepare for Peak Angsty Vibes, Courtesy of Barbie and That Guy From Euphoria

FinnSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Okay, buckle up, buttercups 💅. Warner Bros. Pictures (you know, the folks who brought you… checks notes… stuff) and the…

Splinter Cell: Deathwatch – A Trailer So Bad, It’s Actually Hilarious
Breaking, Movie News

Splinter Cell: Deathwatch – A Trailer So Bad, It’s Actually Hilarious

FinnSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Sam Fisher is back…again? This time, it’s “personal,” which, let’s be honest, is code for “we ran out of original…

Robert Redford, Aging Heartthrob and Overrated Director, Finally Bites the Dust at Ancient Age of 89
Breaking, Movie News

Robert Redford, Aging Heartthrob and Overrated Director, Finally Bites the Dust at Ancient Age of 89

FinnSeptember 16, 2025September 16, 2025

Oh no! 😱 Not another Hollywood legend biting the dust! 🪦 Apparently, Robert Redford, the epitome of blonde-haired, blue-eyed charisma,…

Marvel Zombies: They’re Back and Deader Than Ever, Apparently
Breaking, Movie News

Marvel Zombies: They’re Back and Deader Than Ever, Apparently

FinnSeptember 14, 2025September 14, 2025

Marvel Zombies, or as I like to call it, “Marvel’s Latest Attempt to Milk Your Nostalgia,” is a four-episode animated…

“The Shepherd Code: Road Back” Trailer: Buckle Up for Some Serious Sheep-ishness
Breaking, Movie News

“The Shepherd Code: Road Back” Trailer: Buckle Up for Some Serious Sheep-ishness

FinnSeptember 14, 2025September 14, 2025

M and M Film Productions, bless their cotton socks, have bravely announced that their upcoming crime thriller, The Shepherd Code:…

“Avengers: Doomsday” Teaser—More Like “Avenger’s: Snoozeday,” Am I Right?
Breaking, Movie News

“Avengers: Doomsday” Teaser—More Like “Avenger’s: Snoozeday,” Am I Right?

FinnSeptember 13, 2025September 13, 2025

OMG! 😱 You won’t BELIEVE what Disney just SHOVEd down our throats at their Shanghai marketing expo! 🙄 A LIGHT…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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