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Tag: Music

DEATH to Sanity: A Fall 2025 North American Tour Celebrating DEATH’s Albums That Will Make You Question Your Life Choices
Breaking, Games News

DEATH to Sanity: A Fall 2025 North American Tour Celebrating DEATH’s Albums That Will Make You Question Your Life Choices

Chord F. DiscordJuly 24, 2025July 24, 2025

DEATH TO ALL, the tribute act for the late, great (allegedly) Chuck Schuldiner and his (arguably) pioneering band DEATH, is…

‘Spinal Tap 2’: Prepare for a Sequel So Long-Awaited, It Might Just Break Your Back
Breaking, Movie News

‘Spinal Tap 2’: Prepare for a Sequel So Long-Awaited, It Might Just Break Your Back

FinnJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

Behold! The geriatric rockers of Spinal Tap, back to assault your eardrums and your intelligence, louder (debatable) and older (definitely)…

Ozzy Osbourne Finally On Time — By Dying
Man Who Survived Everything Except Gravity: Ozzy Embarks on Final Tour — No Returns This Time
Music News

Ozzy Osbourne Finally On Time — By Dying

FinnJuly 22, 2025July 22, 2025

LOS ANGELES (or maybe just Hell’s waiting room) — Ozzy Osbourne, legendary frontman, slurred speech pioneer, and the man who…

OMG, Guitar Hero SLASH Teams Up With Universal Studios to Ruin Halloween for Everyone in 2025!
Breaking, Music News

OMG, Guitar Hero SLASH Teams Up With Universal Studios to Ruin Halloween for Everyone in 2025!

Chord F. DiscordJuly 22, 2025July 22, 2025

Universal Studios Hollywood, bless their cotton socks, has decided that the only way to stay relevant is by clinging to…

Deftones Announce 2025 Edition Of ‘Dia De Los Deftones’ Festival (aka the only day Deftones fans get sunlight)
Live, Music News

Deftones Announce 2025 Edition Of ‘Dia De Los Deftones’ Festival (aka the only day Deftones fans get sunlight)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 22, 2025July 22, 2025

DEFTONES, the band that peaked in 2000 but refuses to accept it, have announced yet another installment of their vanity…

Earth’s Zoomies, Robot Besties, and Golden Tickets: Today’s LOLs
Elephant Reads CNN

Earth’s Zoomies, Robot Besties, and Golden Tickets: Today’s LOLs

Big ElephantJuly 22, 2025July 22, 2025

Ah, CNN, still peddling their usual garbage, even under President Trump’s glorious second term! Let’s dissect this leftist propaganda, shall…

SEVENDUST Announces Fall 2025 U.S. Acoustic Tour (So You Can Finally Hear What They’re Mumbling)
Live, Music News

SEVENDUST Announces Fall 2025 U.S. Acoustic Tour (So You Can Finally Hear What They’re Mumbling)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 22, 2025July 22, 2025

OMG! 😱 Sevendust is apparently still a thing and celebrating the 21st anniversary of their *cough* “beloved” acoustic album “Southside…

GWAR’s 40th: Streaming From the Hellmouth (Because VEEPS Pays the Bills)
Breaking, Music News

GWAR’s 40th: Streaming From the Hellmouth (Because VEEPS Pays the Bills)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Behold, feeble humans! Your 👽alien overlords in GWAR, those pioneers of making music that sounds like a garbage truck falling…

HATEBREED Drops New Banger ‘Make The Demons Obey’ After Half a Decade, Demons Tremble in Fear
Breaking, Music News

HATEBREED Drops New Banger ‘Make The Demons Obey’ After Half a Decade, Demons Tremble in Fear

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Ah, HATEBREED, those stalwarts of Connecticut hardcore/metal (is there even a difference anymore?🤔), have finally graced us with new music…

GHOST: Apparently People Can’t Follow Simple Instructions, Film Band on Phones Anyway
Breaking, Music News

GHOST: Apparently People Can’t Follow Simple Instructions, Film Band on Phones Anyway

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

OMG 😱! Some dude filmed GHOST playing “Square Hammer” in Philly on July 19th. Like, who even uses phones anymore?…

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