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Tag: Recently

JetBlue Plane Had an Almost-Kiss with US Air Force Jet Over Venezuela
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

JetBlue Plane Had an Almost-Kiss with US Air Force Jet Over Venezuela

Big ElephantDecember 14, 2025December 14, 2025

JetBlue Pilot Nearly Crashes Into Ghost Tanker, Blames Invisible Air Force While Democrats Cheer A JetBlue flight from Curaçao to…

New Christmas Movies to Watch in 2025 (Because Netflix Finally Ran Out of Reality Shows)
Breaking, Movie News

New Christmas Movies to Watch in 2025 (Because Netflix Finally Ran Out of Reality Shows)

FinnDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

‘Tis the season for brand new Christmas movies, because apparently, we haven’t suffered enough yet. 🎄 As we plunge headfirst…

MAX CAVALERA: ‘I Love The Fact That I Introduced Brazilian Culture To Americans And Europeans’ Through My Music… And Now They Think I’m A Samba Ambassador
Breaking, Music News

MAX CAVALERA: ‘I Love The Fact That I Introduced Brazilian Culture To Americans And Europeans’ Through My Music… And Now They Think I’m A Samba Ambassador

Chord F. DiscordDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Max Cavalera Claims To Be The Only Good Thing To Come Out Of Brazil (Besides Caipirinhas And Soccer…

Watch: EVANESCENCE Plays ‘Afterlife’ At 2025 GAME AWARDS—Apparently the Afterlife Is Full of Loot Boxes
Breaking, Games News, Music News

Watch: EVANESCENCE Plays ‘Afterlife’ At 2025 GAME AWARDS—Apparently the Afterlife Is Full of Loot Boxes

Chord F. DiscordDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

EVANESCENCE Just Stole the Show at the Game Awards, Because Apparently, Video Games Needed a Goth Makeover 🎮🖤 In a…

GUNS N’ ROSES Finally Pick Opening Bands So They Can Look Good By Comparison
Events, Music News

GUNS N’ ROSES Finally Pick Opening Bands So They Can Look Good By Comparison

Chord F. DiscordDecember 11, 2025December 11, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: GUNS N’ ROSES 2026 TOUR ANNOUNCEMENT REVEALED 🚨: AXL ROSE TO UNITE THE NATIONS WITH A LINEUP THAT…

Taylor Swift Struggles to Pick Her Own Best Songs Because Apparently Even She Can’t Keep Up With Her Own Bops
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Taylor Swift Struggles to Pick Her Own Best Songs Because Apparently Even She Can’t Keep Up With Her Own Bops

Big ElephantDecember 11, 2025December 11, 2025

Taylor Swift, in a stunning display of humility (and perhaps a severe case of amnesia), recently appeared on Stephen Colbert’s…

Kamala Harris Extends Book Tour to 2026 Because Apparently Even Her Memoir Needs a Second Chance
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Kamala Harris Extends Book Tour to 2026 Because Apparently Even Her Memoir Needs a Second Chance

Big ElephantDecember 10, 2025December 10, 2025

Kamala Harris announces 2026 book tour extension, now rebranded as ‘How to Lose an Election and Still Get Paid’ –…

Ex-JOURNEY’s Steve Perry Opens Up His Magical Closet of Nostalgia for Holiday Charity Auction (No, You Can’t Bid on His Sweaters)
Breaking, Music News

Ex-JOURNEY’s Steve Perry Opens Up His Magical Closet of Nostalgia for Holiday Charity Auction (No, You Can’t Bid on His Sweaters)

Chord F. DiscordDecember 10, 2025December 10, 2025

Move Over, Santa! Steve Perry Is Coming To Town With A Holiday Auction That’ll Make You Sell Your Soul (And…

SKILLET’s John Cooper Claims Bedroom Conversion at Age Five: Tiny Human, Huge Decision
Breaking, Music News

SKILLET’s John Cooper Claims Bedroom Conversion at Age Five: Tiny Human, Huge Decision

Chord F. DiscordDecember 8, 2025December 8, 2025

In the latest earth-shattering episode of the See The King podcast (sponsored by holy water and gluten-free communion wafers), host…

THE DARKNESS Ruins Christmas 2025 With ‘Mistletoe And Wine’
Breaking, Music News

THE DARKNESS Ruins Christmas 2025 With ‘Mistletoe And Wine’

Chord F. DiscordDecember 7, 2025December 7, 2025

British rockers THE DARKNESS, bless their hearts, have decided to unleash their new single, “Mistletoe And Wine”, upon the unsuspecting…

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Latest posts

  • Curl Bar Block Party 4.0 Because You Clearly Had Nothing Better to Do with Your Saturday
  • The Silence of the Rock Bartender 💀
  • Maryland Deathfest 2026 Aftermovie | 4 Days of Rain, 0 Days of Regret! ☔🤘
  • Backrooms Explained Because You Clearly Need Your Hand Held Through a Bunch of Empty Rooms and Confusing Theories and Also Whats Up with That Async Thingy and Dont Even Get Me Started on the Ending
  • CHARLIE BENANTE Obviously The Real Brain Behind PANTERA Hopes To Bless The World With More PANTERA Music Because Lets Be Real He’s The Only One Who Actually Mattered Anyway

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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