Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Songs

METALLICA Declares Victorious in Epic Battle of the Marching Bands – “For Whom The Band Tolls!” Collegiate Edition!
Breaking, Music News

METALLICA Declares Victorious in Epic Battle of the Marching Bands – “For Whom The Band Tolls!” Collegiate Edition!

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 30, 2026January 30, 2026

Oh no, not another marching band competition! 😩 As if the world needed more reasons for high school students to…

SEPULTURA Unleashes ‘The Cloud Of Unknowing’ EP—Because Who Needs Clarity Anyway?
Breaking, Music News

SEPULTURA Unleashes ‘The Cloud Of Unknowing’ EP—Because Who Needs Clarity Anyway?

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 29, 2026January 29, 2026

SEPULTURA Announces Final EP Title: “The Cloud Of Unknowing” Hold onto your leather pants, metalheads! SEPULTURA, the Brazilian/American metal legends…

The Disney Afternoon Collection: 8 Retro Gems to Make You Question Your Childhood Choices (or Why You Wasted Your Youth on This Instead of Doing Something Productive)
Breaking, Movie News

The Disney Afternoon Collection: 8 Retro Gems to Make You Question Your Childhood Choices (or Why You Wasted Your Youth on This Instead of Doing Something Productive)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 29, 2026January 29, 2026

ATTENTION, 90S KIDS: Your childhood is being sold back to you, and you’re going to love it Oh look, another…

POST MALONE, SLASH, DUFF MCKAGAN And CHAD SMITH Unite To Do A Half-Decent Impression Of OZZY OSBOURNE At The 2026 GRAMMYs
Breaking, Music News

POST MALONE, SLASH, DUFF MCKAGAN And CHAD SMITH Unite To Do A Half-Decent Impression Of OZZY OSBOURNE At The 2026 GRAMMYs

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 28, 2026January 28, 2026

Oh great, another Grammy tribute, because what the world really needs is more middle-aged men in leather jackets pretending they…

SKID ROW’s Rachel Bolan Unleashes Self-Absorbed Side Hustle ‘Gargoyle Of The Garden State’ This June—Breaking Up Lawn Decor and Eardrums Alike
Breaking, Music News

SKID ROW’s Rachel Bolan Unleashes Self-Absorbed Side Hustle ‘Gargoyle Of The Garden State’ This June—Breaking Up Lawn Decor and Eardrums Alike

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 28, 2026January 28, 2026

Hold onto your hairspray cans, folks, because SKID ROW bassist Rachel Bolan just discovered he can do… everything 😱. On…

Exclusive: Clawfinger Finally Releases New Album After 19 Years — Band Confirms ‘Yes, We Forgot We Were Musicians’
Breaking, Music News

Exclusive: Clawfinger Finally Releases New Album After 19 Years — Band Confirms ‘Yes, We Forgot We Were Musicians’

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 27, 2026January 27, 2026

Oh sweet baby Ragnarök, the Swedish-Norwegian rap-metal geriatrics of CLAWFINGER have crawled out of their crypts to bless us with…

Caught in 4K: Watch NAILBOMB Attempt Sonic Terrorism Against LA’s Remaining Ear Canal Population
Breaking, Music News

Caught in 4K: Watch NAILBOMB Attempt Sonic Terrorism Against LA’s Remaining Ear Canal Population

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 27, 2026January 27, 2026

Hold onto your grandma’s dentures, folks! 🦷💥 Because NAILBOMB just blew the roof off 1720 in Los Angeles with a…

Ex-DEICIDE Guitarist JACK OWEN Tells Glen Benton He Wasn’t In His Weird Little Bubble But Thanks For The Invitation Anyway
Breaking, Music News

Ex-DEICIDE Guitarist JACK OWEN Tells Glen Benton He Wasn’t In His Weird Little Bubble But Thanks For The Invitation Anyway

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

So, here we are again, folks. Another day, another former member of a legendary death metal band throwing shade like…

CHAD GRAY Calls HELLYEAH Reunion a Total Clusterf**k: ‘Slapping the Band Back Together Without Vinnie Paul Like a Weird Frankenstein’s Monster’
Breaking, Music News

CHAD GRAY Calls HELLYEAH Reunion a Total Clusterf**k: ‘Slapping the Band Back Together Without Vinnie Paul Like a Weird Frankenstein’s Monster’

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 25, 2026January 25, 2026

Picture this: Chad Gray, the man with the lung capacity of a steam engine and the vocal stylings of a…

Watch: URIAH HEEP Celebrates 50 Years of Existence by Finally Getting Rid of Their Only Remaining Original Member, Mick Box
Breaking, Music News

Watch: URIAH HEEP Celebrates 50 Years of Existence by Finally Getting Rid of Their Only Remaining Original Member, Mick Box

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 24, 2026January 24, 2026

Uriah Heep Kicks Off Scandinavian ‘Magician’s Farewell’ Tour in Tampere—Because Even Legends Need a Nap 😴🎸 In a move that…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 36 37 38 … 54 Next

Latest posts

  • Doechii, Phoebe Bridgers, Fontaines D.C. Top Primavera Sound Anniversary Bill
  • Biden and Trump Unite For World Peace Apparently
  • Supreme Court To Weigh In On Cities Vs Oil Companies
  • Tennessee Prison Chief Nails Job With Execution Errors
  • China’s Secret Agent Apparently Didn’t Get The Memo

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.