Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Sports

Pilates studio owner trades core strength for mountain of problems
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Pilates studio owner trades core strength for mountain of problems

Big ElephantAugust 1, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Sarah Mallory Geis, a Pilates studio owner from San Antonio, Texas, who…

Pubishers FORCE Football Oversaturation onto Your Phone
Breaking

Pubishers FORCE Football Oversaturation onto Your Phone

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 30, 2026July 30, 2026

Oh joy, another way for EA to suck the last bit of cash from our wallets, and we’re just too…

EA milks soccer cash cow with FC 27 cover athlete reveal
Breaking, Games News

EA milks soccer cash cow with FC 27 cover athlete reveal

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 28, 2026July 28, 2026

Another year, another iteration of the same old football series, because that’s what we all needed – more of the…

VA Secretary Has Alternative Facts On Veteran Wait Times Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

VA Secretary Has Alternative Facts On Veteran Wait Times Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like the VA is having some major issues with…

Older politicians face youthful challengers in Massachusetts
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Older politicians face youthful challengers in Massachusetts

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems Rep. Seth Moulton is throwing his hat into the…

Kalshi Forces Netflix To Yank Doc For Being Too Accurate Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Kalshi Forces Netflix To Yank Doc For Being Too Accurate Somehow

Big ElephantJuly 24, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. So, it seems like Kalshi, a prediction market company, is threatening…

Blizzard monetizes meme with Jimothy raccoon pet in World of Warcraft
Breaking, Games News

Blizzard monetizes meme with Jimothy raccoon pet in World of Warcraft

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 24, 2026July 24, 2026

In a world where the internet has become a never-ending dumpster fire, it’s refreshing to see a story that brings…

Warner Bros peddles Batman exclusivity to Amazon Luna
Breaking, Movie News

Warner Bros peddles Batman exclusivity to Amazon Luna

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 23, 2026July 24, 2026

Amazon and Warner Bros. are at it again, because what the world really needed was another Batman game. I mean,…

Point Break is Back Because You Clearly Didn’t Learn to Surf or Rob Banks the First Time Around
Breaking, Movie News

Point Break is Back Because You Clearly Didn’t Learn to Surf or Rob Banks the First Time Around

FinnJuly 21, 2026July 21, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some totally tubular news? 🏄‍♂️🎥 Point Break, the most righteous action thriller of…

Eagles Star Saquon Barkley Loses More Than Yardage at Home
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Eagles Star Saquon Barkley Loses More Than Yardage at Home

Big ElephantJuly 19, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest crazy news – an attempted burglary at the home of…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 3 4 5 … 16 Next

Latest posts

  • Mastodon Celebrates 20 Years of Blood Mountain
  • Brandon Flowers Covers Oasis With Son Onstage In Salt Lake City
  • Man Wondering What The Prayers Of A Not-So-Righteous Man Availeth
  • Turnstile Scores Big With Five Guys Feature
  • CEO Urges Caution in AI Arms Race Because That’s Working Great So Far

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.