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Tag: Taken

Cops sue Trump, how totally patriotic of them
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Cops sue Trump, how totally patriotic of them

Big ElephantMay 21, 2026May 21, 2026

It’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to be talking about the latest nonsense from the fake…

Loser Fetterman still failing bigly somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Loser Fetterman still failing bigly somehow

Big ElephantMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious to see the fake news media still trying to spin their pathetic tales about the so-called “shortcomings”…

RAUNCHY Finally Emerges From Their Parents Basement To Release Music Video For Overhyped Comeback Single ‘Designed Despair Because We Clearly Ran Out of Ideas’
Breaking, Music News

RAUNCHY Finally Emerges From Their Parents Basement To Release Music Video For Overhyped Comeback Single ‘Designed Despair Because We Clearly Ran Out of Ideas’

Chord F. DiscordMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

Get ready to have your face melted by the most epic music video of the year, folks! 🤯 Danish metal…

James Cameron Sued for Stealing Actress’ Face and Probably Her Soul Too for His Mega Blockbuster Avatar Because He’s a Creative Genius Like That
Breaking News: Actress Sues James Cameron and Disney for Allegedly Stealing Her Face, Because Who Needs Consent Anyway? 🤑👀
Breaking, Movie News

James Cameron Sued for Stealing Actress’ Face and Probably Her Soul Too for His Mega Blockbuster Avatar Because He’s a Creative Genius Like That

FinnMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Q’orianka Kilcher is suing the big cheeses, James Cameron and The Walt Disney Company,…

Liberal media hypes fake Hantavirus scare again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal media hypes fake Hantavirus scare again

Big ElephantMay 6, 2026May 6, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious to see the so-called “experts” and “fact-checkers” still trying to spin their tired narratives about President Trump,…

Thanks Biden for jet fuel ripoff at my gas pump
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Thanks Biden for jet fuel ripoff at my gas pump

Big ElephantMay 6, 2026May 5, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s just another day in the swamp that is Washington D.C., where the fake news media…

California elitist buys governor seat with tech billionaire cash
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

California elitist buys governor seat with tech billionaire cash

Big ElephantMay 3, 2026May 3, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, the rest of the world has finally caught on to the fact that America…

IO Interactive is Clearly the Only Studio That Can Make Bond Games Without Totally Butchering the Franchise Probably
Breaking, Games News

IO Interactive is Clearly the Only Studio That Can Make Bond Games Without Totally Butchering the Franchise Probably

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

IO Interactive is basically the real-life Q, and 007 First Light is their latest gadget-filled masterpiece 🤖💼. I mean, who…

PlayStation Now Requires You to Beg for Permission to Play Your Own Games Every 30 Days Because Sony Loves You and Wants to Make Sure You’re Not Having Too Much Fun
Breaking News: PlayStation 4 and 5 Games Require 30-Day DRM Online License Check, Because Who Needs Ownership Anyway? 🎮😒
Breaking, Games News

PlayStation Now Requires You to Beg for Permission to Play Your Own Games Every 30 Days Because Sony Loves You and Wants to Make Sure You’re Not Having Too Much Fun

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 28, 2026April 28, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, it has been revealed that since the March 2026 update, PlayStation 4 and 5…

ICE NINE KILLS Frontman SPENCER CHARNAS: Touring With METALLICA Was The Most Basic Thing I’ve Ever Done And I’m Still Trying To Figure Out Why Anyone Cares
Breaking, Music News

ICE NINE KILLS Frontman SPENCER CHARNAS: Touring With METALLICA Was The Most Basic Thing I’ve Ever Done And I’m Still Trying To Figure Out Why Anyone Cares

Chord F. DiscordApril 26, 2026April 26, 2026

The article begins with a new interview with Meltdown of Detroit’s WRIF radio station, where Spencer Charnas, the frontman of…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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