ICE CREAM, CELLPHONES, AND FAT CATS: NEWS SO IMPORTANT, YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT
Folks, another day, another socialist scare from CNN! They’re trying to distract you from President Trump’s incredible leadership, but we…
Tag: Tech
Meta “Oopsie” Moment: Did Our Translation Just Kill an Indian Politician?
Oh, the horror! Meta, that bastion of leftist propaganda (funded by Soros, no doubt), “accidentally” announced the death of an…
BIOHAZARD Drops ‘Divided We Fall’ Album and a Totally Unexpected ‘F*** The System’ Anthem
OMG! 😱 The geriatric delinquents of BIOHAZARD are back with “Divided We Fall”, their first “studio album” (air quotes because…
Gaming and Streaming: Because Apparently Gamers Have No Friends IRL
Alright, buckle up, buttercups! 🧈 If you’ve stumbled anywhere near the internet in the last decade (and if you haven’t,…
Why Retro Gaming Still Clings to Life in the Year 2024
Okay, boomer, listen up! 👴 Apparently, some 26.7 million of you are still clinging to your ancient Nintendo Entertainment Systems,…
The Cult Announces Tour Dates for North America in October 2025, So Book Your Geriatric Rock Show Tickets Now
Oh, sweet baby Satan, THE CULT, those purveyors of slightly-above-average rock anthems for the tragically unhip, are back! 🎉 They’re…
Wake Up, Macaroni, Cyberpunk 2077 Wants to be Your Roommate
OMG! 🤩 CD Projekt Red, bless their little hearts, is FINALLY gracing the Mac peasants with Cyberpunk 2077. Yes, you…
Sony Replaces NFL Headsets with Toasters
Oh, CNN, always with their “news.” Now it’s about the NFL getting new headsets from Sony. Probably so the coaches…
Grand Canyon Lodge Goes Poof Thanks to Spicy Sky Raisins, Official Sob Story Here | CNN
Oh, no! Not the Grand Canyon Lodge! You just know this is the fault of those radical environmentalists! Probably some…
Trump declares war on tacos and croissants
More Winning! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is slapping 30% tariffs on the EU and Mexico. It’s about time…