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Tag: Tech

AI Bullshit: Why Your Portfolio is About to Get Skynet-ted
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

AI Bullshit: Why Your Portfolio is About to Get Skynet-ted

Big ElephantNovember 27, 2025November 27, 2025

Nvidia, the Deep State’s favorite chipmaker, posts “blockbuster” earnings, but the stock dips? Sounds like Soros is shorting it, folks!…

Cargo Ship Throws Fiery Tantrum at Port of Los Angeles, Everyone Freaks Out
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Cargo Ship Throws Fiery Tantrum at Port of Los Angeles, Everyone Freaks Out

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Another day, another disaster courtesy of the Lib-controlled Port of Los Angeles! You just KNOW this fire on the One…

Robert Plant Accidentally Admits He Listens to Nonesuch Records (We’re Shocked)
Breaking, Music News

Robert Plant Accidentally Admits He Listens to Nonesuch Records (We’re Shocked)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

So, Robert Plant, bless his ever-so-humble heart, popped by Nonesuch Records’ “Nonesuch Selects” video series. You know, the one where…

LAMB OF GOD Drops New Single ‘Parasocial Christ’ – Prepare to Worship Your Screen
Breaking, Music News

LAMB OF GOD Drops New Single ‘Parasocial Christ’ – Prepare to Worship Your Screen

Chord F. DiscordNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

LAMB OF GOD, those elder statesmen of metalcore dad-rock, have graced us with “Parasocial Christ,” a three-minute sonic tantrum designed…

Ulver Just Dropped a ‘Neverland’ Album and a Single Called ‘Weeping Stone’ – Prepare for Maximum Existential Dread
Breaking, Music News

Ulver Just Dropped a ‘Neverland’ Album and a Single Called ‘Weeping Stone’ – Prepare for Maximum Existential Dread

Chord F. DiscordNovember 20, 2025November 20, 2025

ULVER, those lovable trolls from Norway 🇳🇴, are gracing us with “Weeping Stone”, a single so profound it’ll make you…

MAGA Meltdown: Civil War Edition
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

MAGA Meltdown: Civil War Edition

Big ElephantNovember 18, 2025November 18, 2025

Another day, another Deep State plot! Even with our glorious leader, President Trump, at the helm for his *second* term,…

Wake Up, Buttercup: Another Knives Out Trailer to Judge Harshly
Benoit Blanc returns, probably to solve another murder because that's literally all he does. 😴
Breaking, Movie News

Wake Up, Buttercup: Another Knives Out Trailer to Judge Harshly

FinnNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Daniel Craig is BACK (again) as Benoit Blanc in Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery, because apparently, Rian…

Adriana Kugler, Ex-Fed Bigwig, Oopsie-Doopsied Her Way Through Trading Rules, CNN Sniffs Out
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Adriana Kugler, Ex-Fed Bigwig, Oopsie-Doopsied Her Way Through Trading Rules, CNN Sniffs Out

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Another Deep State Operative Busted! Crooked Kugler, a Biden appointee, caught red-handed breaking Fed rules with her shady stock trades.…

Woody and Buzz Return in Toy Story 5: Prepare for More Existential Dread and Plastic Mayhem
Breaking, Movie News

Woody and Buzz Return in Toy Story 5: Prepare for More Existential Dread and Plastic Mayhem

FinnNovember 11, 2025November 11, 2025

Woody and Buzz, those dusty relics of childhood, are back for Toy Story 5, because apparently, Pixar ran out of…

MUDVAYNE’s New Album: Chad Gray’s Got NO CLUE, LOL
Breaking, Music News

MUDVAYNE’s New Album: Chad Gray’s Got NO CLUE, LOL

Chord F. DiscordNovember 9, 2025November 9, 2025

In a recent interview with Toilet Ov Hell (yes, you read that right 🚽), MUDVAYNE’s supreme leader, Chad Gray, graced…

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