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You Won’t Believe Who Trump Chatted With Right Before That Settlement
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You Won’t Believe Who Trump Chatted With Right Before That Settlement

Big ElephantJune 24, 2026June 24, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Live Nation’s CEO, Michael Rapino, had a chat with President Donald…

Rockstar’s Greed Reaches New Heights with $80 GTA 6 Base Model
Breaking, Games News

Rockstar’s Greed Reaches New Heights with $80 GTA 6 Base Model

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 24, 2026June 24, 2026

Because apparently we haven’t milked this franchise enough yet, Rockstar Games has decided to unveil more details about the next…

Sovereign Tower Preview – Because You Clearly Don’t Have Enough Anxiety in Your Life and Need a Time-Bending RPG to Drive You Completely Insane
Breaking, Games News

Sovereign Tower Preview – Because You Clearly Don’t Have Enough Anxiety in Your Life and Need a Time-Bending RPG to Drive You Completely Insane

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 15, 2026June 15, 2026

Oh great, another chance to be a supreme ruler and make all the wrong decisions 🤣! Sovereign Tower, the new…

Why Isn’t Jesse Eisenberg in ‘The Social Network’ Sequel Because Clearly the World Was Just Missing a Second Helping of Aaron Sorkin’s Ego and More Scenes of Mark Zuckerberg Eating Cereal
Breaking, Movie News

Why Isn’t Jesse Eisenberg in ‘The Social Network’ Sequel Because Clearly the World Was Just Missing a Second Helping of Aaron Sorkin’s Ego and More Scenes of Mark Zuckerberg Eating Cereal

FinnJune 14, 2026June 14, 2026

It’s been a whopping 16 years since Jesse Eisenberg first played the role of Mark Zuckerberg in The Social Network,…

Echoes of Aincrad Hands-On Preview Because You Clearly Haven’t Played Enough SAO Video Games Already
Breaking, Games News

Echoes of Aincrad Hands-On Preview Because You Clearly Haven’t Played Enough SAO Video Games Already

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 10, 2026June 10, 2026

Wow, I’m So Excited to Dive Back into the World of Sword Art Online with Echoes of Aincrad 🤩! I…

Super Official Totally Not Made Up Book About SLIPKNOT That They Definitely Didnt Try To Stop From Being Written All About Their Rise To Fame And The Chaos
Breaking, Music News

Super Official Totally Not Made Up Book About SLIPKNOT That They Definitely Didnt Try To Stop From Being Written All About Their Rise To Fame And The Chaos

Chord F. DiscordJune 8, 2026June 8, 2026

Breaking news: the world is finally getting a book about Slipknot, and we’re all just thrilled 🤩🎉. I mean, who…

Oh Joy Another Roguelike Because We Were All Just Sitting Around Twiddling Our Thumbs Waiting For Chivalware To Save The Genre
Breaking, Games News

Oh Joy Another Roguelike Because We Were All Just Sitting Around Twiddling Our Thumbs Waiting For Chivalware To Save The Genre

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 1, 2026June 1, 2026

The roguelike genre has finally been saved by Chivalware, and I’m not being sarcastic at all 😂. I mean, who…

X-Men 97 Season 2 Trailer Finally Arrives to Save Us from the Crushing Despair of Having to Watch Anything Else
Breaking, Movie News

X-Men 97 Season 2 Trailer Finally Arrives to Save Us from the Crushing Despair of Having to Watch Anything Else

FinnMay 28, 2026May 28, 2026

Get ready for the most epic season of X-Men ’97 yet, folks! 🚨💥 This summer, the Marvel Animation team is…

Planet Zoo 2 Announced Because You Clearly Didn’t Spend Enough Money on the First One and Now We’re Adding Fish and Birds to Take More of Your Cash
Breaking, Games News

Planet Zoo 2 Announced Because You Clearly Didn’t Spend Enough Money on the First One and Now We’re Adding Fish and Birds to Take More of Your Cash

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 28, 2026May 28, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some zoo-tastic news? 🎉🦁 Frontier Developments, the geniuses behind Planet Coaster and Elite:…

HALESTORM’s LZZY HALE Totally Not Freaking Out About Touring With BABYMETAL Because What Could Possibly Go Wrong With That
Breaking, Music News

HALESTORM’s LZZY HALE Totally Not Freaking Out About Touring With BABYMETAL Because What Could Possibly Go Wrong With That

Chord F. DiscordMay 18, 2026May 18, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for the most epic tour announcement ever? 🤩🎸 HALESTORM is hitting the road with…

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Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Washington D.C. Sees Sudden Drop to No Crime Under President Trump
  • NEW TRANSMISSION Micron pours first concrete at New York fab in US investment push
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: Micron invests $250 billion creating 100000 American jobs
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Micron to invest 250 billion dollars in US memory chip production
  • Vance Expands Housing Portfolio With Spare Virginia Mansion

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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