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Tag: Tool
COHEED AND CAMBRIA Drops Festive Propaganda Cartoon Because Nothing Says Christmas Like a Political Agenda
Breaking News: Coheed and Cambria Drop Festive Banger About ICE Kidnapping Children for Christmas — Because Nothing Says ‘Holiday Cheer’…
LACUNA COIL’s CRISTINA SCABBIA: ‘I Hate Music Made With A.I. Because My Toaster Tried To Remix My Ballads’
In a shocking turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the darkened basements of the internet, Cristina Scabbia of…
AC/DC’s PHIL RUDD Finally Joins March 2026 ‘Full Metal Orchestra’ Because Apparently They Couldn’t Book A Drum Machine
Cue the thunderous roar of a thousand kettles boiling in unison — Phil Rudd, the human metronome with a criminal…
EPICA Releases New Single ‘Avatar – The Final Incarnation’ and It’s Not Even the Sequel
In a shocking turn of events that nobody saw coming (except their entire fanbase, their label, and literally everyone with…
Guillermo Del Toro Throws Shade at AI Art, Declares War on Robots in Hollywood
Guillermo del Toro, the cinematic genius (or so he thinks 🙄), took a break from patting himself on the back…
Wolfie Plays All The Instruments Himself Because Apparently He Doesn’t Trust Anyone Else In The World
In a new interview with Cutter’s Rockcast, So, apparently, this dude Wolfgang Van Halen, the mastermind behind MAMMOTH WVH, thinks…
Shinedown Dumps New Single ‘Searchlight’ Like We Asked For It
SHINEDOWN, those purveyors of sonic wallpaper, have graced us with a new ditty, “Searchlight”, via their overlords at Atlantic Records.…
Tariffs: Taxes in Disguise? Court to Decide if Trump’s Trade War Was Just One Big Tax Scam
Folks, CNN is at it again, trying to undermine our great President Trump! They’re whining about tariffs, calling them a…
Islands: Yet Another Trailer Starring People You’ve Barely Heard Of
Oh, look, another “twisty thriller” 🙄. This one’s about a tennis coach, because apparently, being a tennis coach at a…